Channel 35 late at night,
You'd see naked girls dancing---
Not so bright.
Then, on the screen you would see---
Al Goldstein, fat and mean,
Acting soo obscene!

It's so sad, oh so sad that a grown man,
Has to act that way.
Al Goldstein, fat and mean,
The regent bad porn king!

He did some dumb things along the way,
And his employees sued him in a major way.
In jail and homeless on the big highway---
Al Goldstein, fat and mean
The shriveled old has-been!

(Repeat verse until the end of the song).