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Song Parodies -> "As Time Goes By"

Original Song Title:

"As Tears Go By"

Original Performer:

The Rolling Stones

Parody Song Title:

"As Time Goes By"

Parody Written by:

David Chrenko

The Lyrics

You must remember this . . .
In Rick's Cafe Americain,
I sit alone, except for Sam.
Casablanca, I believe,
Is not for me.
Sam starts to play "As Time Goes By".

We once had Paris in the spring.
Down in the café, Sam would sing.
We'd request the Hit Parade,
But Sam just played,
One song he knew, "As Time Goes By".

And so I sit and nurse my drink.
Clock's striking two, I start to think.
"Sam", I sez, "You've played all night".
"I don't know why."
"I've never liked "As Time Goes By"."

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   5

User Comments

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Guy - March 03, 2004 - Report this comment
I liked this, well done.
Johnny D - March 03, 2004 - Report this comment
David, this is GENIUS. 5's Reminds me of what I did with the opening line of my parody of A Whiter Shade of Pale: " I tried to rhyme "Fandango" / In Queen's Rhapsody once more " ...... David, you took two songs that have an underlying artistic overlap and crafted a masterpiece here - congratulations on a job well done.
David Chrenko - March 03, 2004 - Report this comment
Gosh, thanks Johnny D . . . Genius, huh? . . . who'da thunk it?
Rick D - March 03, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks for mentioning me in a song again, and how did you know Mari's nickname is "Sam"?
David Chrenko - March 03, 2004 - Report this comment
Well, sure Rick, I loved you in Casablanca. Thanks for the comment, but, as Clara Peller would ask, "Where's the Vote?"
David Chrenko - March 03, 2004 - Report this comment
Well, sure Rick, I loved you in Casablanca. Thanks for the comment, but, as Clara Peller would ask, "Where's the Vote?"
Johnny D - March 03, 2004 - Report this comment
Hey ChuckyG - how come David Chrenko gets to post two comments to the same parody within 2 seconds of each other but the rest of us don't, huh? LOL LOL LOL ;-)
Department of Redundancy Department - March 03, 2004 - Report this comment
Ooops, my finger stuttered on the keyboard! Rick, just read one of my comments (pick out the one you like). But Johnny D raises a good point. How could this happen? Where will this madness end?
Susan Powter - March 03, 2004 - Report this comment
Stop the insanity!
alvin rhodes - March 03, 2004 - Report this comment
so good i wanna play it again
Paul Robinson - March 03, 2004 - Report this comment
It's quite simple, really, and I'm I surprised Johnny D didn't have this figured out: By using "As Tears Go By" as a parody template for an "As Time Goes By" scenario David inadvertedly opened a small hole in the "Space-Time Contedium" that allowed him to post two identical comments to Rick within seconds of each other without being "twit-controlled". Also, for those two seconds Mick Jagger and Keith Richard were transported back into the scene with Bogey and Bacall and were playing "You Can't Always Get What You Want" in the place where "Sam" usually play "As Time Goes By". By the way, Sam really was quite disoriented when he found himself standing there on the concert set for the Rolling Stones "Brown Sugar" number with an electric guitar in his hands and Ron Wood grinning at him rather impishly. The giant tongue really freaked him out. Mick thought Casablanca was a gas. Keith really didn't notice any difference, I guess heroin can do that sometimes. But anyway, it's all closed back up now. It was only a few seconds, after all...
Michael Pacholek - March 03, 2004 - Report this comment
Just as I suspected, David, you're a sentimentalist! Is this the first "Casablanca" parody on the site? Now I've gotta write one. And what I've gotta write, you can't follow. Listen, you guys, if you don't give this parody all fives, you'll regret it. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but soon, and for the rest of your life. (But, Mike what about Pam Anderson and her little sex video?) We'll always have Paris. (I better stop this, before Michael Jackson says, "Here's lookin' at you, kid.")
Diva - March 03, 2004 - Report this comment
It read as beautifuly, as the black & white film.
The Cigarette-Smoking Man From The X-Files - March 03, 2004 - Report this comment
So, "Paul Robinson".....(hhhpphhhhhhpphhhh) think you're pretty smart, do you, now, eh?.....(phhhhhhhh)....Stumbled on our little secret Space-Time-Parody-Continuum-Project, did you?........(hhhppphhhhh).....Don't be surprised if the next time you start to write a comment, you experience a little "missing time" and then discover a Mercedes-Benz-hood-ornament-shaped mark on the back of your John Thomas.....(ppphhhhhhh).
David Chrenko - March 03, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks Diva . . . Paul, you crack me up! . . . Michael, I look forward to your parody. Y'know, in the "Political Remake" of Casablanca, the French-looking John Kerry would have to play Inspector Renault. Then we could replace the original fat man,Sidney Greenstreet with Ted Kennedy, and replace Peter Lorey with Dick Morris (THAT one really works for me!). If Charles Rangel can tinkle the ivories, he can play Sam. The main characters are tougher. Twenty years ago Ronald Reagan could play Rick. After all he almost got the role in the movie. But who could do it now? For comedy relief, how about Susan Estrich as Ilsa? Otherwise, I'd go with Fox News covergirl, Laurie Dhue. Besides, I don't think Michael could stomach Ann Coulter in the role. I think George W would make a pretty fair Victor Laslo, which still leaves us without a leading man. Oh yes, and we MUST find a role for Larry King. Any suggestions, or re-castings?
oknerhC DivaD - March 03, 2004 - Report this comment
"?etoV eht s'erehW" ,ksa dluow relleP aralC sa ,tub ,tnemmoc eht rof sknahT .acnalbasaC ni uoy devol I ,kciR erus ,lleW . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Great Caesar's Ghost, Paul! . . . What have we unleashed!!
Chuck-Rick - March 03, 2004 - Report this comment
Of all the parody-joints in all the world, he logs onto mine....well, if he can take it, so can I.... POST IT!
Paul Robinson - March 03, 2004 - Report this comment
oknerhC DivaD - I think the vote got left back in the 1940's under Sam's piano bench. I'd volunteer to go retrieve it, but hell, I don't even like to fly, much less time travel....OH OH....a report just in: the "Rick-Bogey" character has been spotted crooning "I'll never be your beast of burden", he's looking for the Lauren Bacall character but he's heading up toward Courtney Love's house right now....Frankly, I don't that's a good way to get to Nirvana...But hey, at least I'm safe from the "The Cigarette-Smoking Man From The X-Files". He THINKS he's got my time-warp figured out but he failed to notice mine is the "Space-Time CONTEDIUM", NOT "Continuum"...He's barking up the wrong worm-hole...
John Jenkins - March 03, 2004 - Report this comment
If you're looking for people who steal votes, we'll have to round up the usual suspects. Clever parody, David. I liked the last line.
The Cigarette-Smoking Man From The X-Files - March 03, 2004 - Report this comment
So, "Paul Robinson".....(hhhpphhhhhhpphhhh) think it's "Contedium", do you?......(ppphhhhhhh).....I suggest you examine your John Thomas now......(hhhhhppphhhhhh)'ll see the totally invisible mark I warned you about....(pphhhhhhh).....
David Chrenko - March 04, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks for all the votes/comments. What I like about the comments part is that you never know the direction they're going to head. I've read all these whacky comments (and included a couple of my own) and I STILL don't know where we all went. Here's looking at you, kids. LOL
Michael Pacholek - March 04, 2004 - Report this comment
David: Kerry looks French? I realize he isn't Irish, but, as the old saying goes, "Funny, he doesn't look Jewish." Try Chuck Schumer. He's a New Yorker, and it's very believable that he doesn't get the girl in the end. Bush as Victor? Considering what his grandpa was doing at the time, I doubt he would be fighting Nazis. Try John McCain. And since Greenstreet was bald, and Ted's still got that Kennedy hair, we'd have to go to... Dick Cheney! You wanna off Dick Morris early in the film? As Paris Hilton's great-grandpa would say, "Be my guest!" Susan Estrich? Why not Karenna Schiff? You know, the President's daughter! (Well, the President-elect's daughter, anyway.) The only role I could stomach Ann Coulter in is Freddy Kreuger, but she'd have to put on weight. Of course, Ashcroft is Major Strasser and Limbaugh is his aide. And Larry King, though Jewish, can be the Nazi magazine writer Rick tells, "You're lucky the bar is open to ya!" Just make sure you stand when they play "Les Marseillaise!" L'etendard sanglant est leve!
Paul Robinson - March 04, 2004 - Report this comment
Michael P - Actually, I think Ann Coulter would be just PERFECT as one of those creatures in "Aliens", you know, nasty, skinny, venomous reptiles with steel teeth and snappish dispositions, poisonous, flesh dissolving bile dripping with every lunatic remark spewed out. Can you picture THAT: her voice and style coming out of one of those creatures on some political punditry show? "Bill, let me tell you about all these Treasonous Liberals..."
Michael Pacholek - March 04, 2004 - Report this comment
It shouldn't take long, Paul, because there's not much to tell. If Ann were around in 1776, she'd probably be bonking the Prince of Wales (the future George IV -- I looked it up, he would've been 14, but who would've cared?) and calling for Washington to be shot, Jefferson to be hung and Franklin to be struck by lightning. I think she's sorry she wasn't born soon enough to fool around with Ol' Strom, or that USC benchwarmer Marion Morrison, the Duke of Wayne.
David Chrenko - March 07, 2004 - Report this comment
Michael, I can't see Dick Cheney doing Sidney Greenstreet, the way Teddy could. Ted "holds court", which is what Greenstreet does in most of his films. I do see Cheney as the pudgy Slavik waiter who played Uncle Felix in "Christmas In Connecticut". McCain's a good possibility for the Victor Laslo role - until he has to sing. As far as Dick Morris goes, you may be right. Why "off" him at the beginning of the film. I could also see him as Inspector Renault. Remember. They both have a bit of larceny in them, and swear no particular allegiance to either side. I'm not picking these people based on political affiliations, but on what personalities might click in a film parody, sort of like D.C. Follies.

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