i'm seen in red cords, but my top is faded plaid
no color sense, i'm told...i always mix in plaid
folks see my look and sigh...a sin to wear such clothes
they have to turn their heads...because they think its gross

i have a lot of shirts but all of them are plaid
i've got my top all tucked inside my crimson slacks
i see people turn their heads and chuckle in dismay
its just too darn crazy, it looks crappy, they would say

i look down at myself and see my faded plaid
i'm wearin' red cords but i don't think that they clash
maybe i should change my ways
and put on some plain black pants
instead of all this crazy stuff
like red cords mixed with plaid

no more will i be seen bedecked in stripes of blue
criss-crossed with green stripes, perpendicular, ran through
if i try hard enough...my fashion sense won't stun
then folks won't laugh at me and poke all kinds of fun

i'm seen in red cords, but my top is faded plaid
i've tartan by the score, but only bright red pants
i get some real stink-eye when dressed in clashin' clothes
i wear some weird-ass threads, but deem them apropos

hmm hmm hmm

i feel sophisticated...draped in plaid
slacks, so bright...slacks, so bold
i find this combo fun...try it out on the sly
i feel sophisticated, draped in faded...faded plaid..yeah

hmm hmm hmm