Is your colon spastic, on the doctor's chart?
Diagnosis can free you if "going" is hard
Colon's spastic, if your movements are soupy
It makes you feel crappy when you can't go pooopie

I'd tell you about this Zelnorm, if it could free those bowels
But I'm not dieing to tell curmudgeons when they sh!t-N-scowl

If your colon's spastic, don't bother me now
I don't want to hear it if you're having a cow
Just go try sh!tten with a vertical smile
It won't wipe off your ass no matter how hard you rile

Your cheeks start chaffing as you udder a grunt
I just don't care, so just call me blunt

If your colon's spastic, grunt in privacy
Those I-B-S symptoms, are not opinion free
And maybe, if the doctor prescribes
You'll get a colonic where the sun don't hide

If your stool's impacting, you should, see a shrink
Don't be anal and retentive, if your position stinks Yeah!

Uhhh is your colon spastic?
Ahhh Please let Dr. Butterfinger check your hole

Doctors have colonics for anal woes
Doctors have the Zelnorm that can set you free
ohh, you could be spastic

Are you opined like you're anal is your colon spastic?
Are you opined like you're anal is your colon spastic?
Are you opined like you're anal is your colon spastic?