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Song Parodies -> "My First Good Look At My Bride"

Original Song Title:

"Ticket To Ride"

Original Performer:

The Beatles

Parody Song Title:

"My First Good Look At My Bride"

Parody Written by:

Paul Robinson

The Lyrics

Love at first sight? Think this guy shoulda took a 2nd look...
Something is making me sad
Please let me explain, yeah
Just got a look at the wife
I married today
Got a good look at my bride
There were some things she did hide
When I found out I just sighed
She's got no hair

She's got a plastic left knee
it swivels around - Gad!
From one eye she cannot see
at night it comes out
Wonder if anything's real
Elbows are made out of steel
Breasts now I'm afraid to feel
I'm just too scared

When we made love she kept off the lights
That didn't seem right
I should have asked "why", I see
She's got some biker's name on her thigh
and with her legs spread
that biker's head stares at me

This situation I have
It won't go away, bleah!
She needs a liver transplant
her old one is frayed - bad
Giving my stomach the eye
pokes my abdomen at night
can't sleep; I don't even try
I just don't dare

We get in bed; she looks at her knife
I'd better act nice
She might take a slice of me
I'm scared to death; I cannot deny
I picked the wrong wife
That was not too bright, I see

And now she's talking real sweet
Says, "Baby, calm down", Hah!
"Why are you frightened of me?"
She said with a frown

"Well, Baby, I'm scared for my life
Stressed out from all of this strife
Should not have made you my wife"
And she just stared
Please save me, I'm scared; She's crazy - beware
More than I can bear; I'm filled with despair
I'm having nightmares; now kneeling in prayer

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 13

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   13

User Comments

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Stuart McArthur - December 17, 2004 - Report this comment
yes, it reminds me of the Bobbit "sleep on your stomach" speaking tour - what's going on with you and wives at the moment Paul?? - 555
John Barry - December 17, 2004 - Report this comment
Bionic fives.
MrMacphisto - December 17, 2004 - Report this comment
This one gets three real 5's
2nz - December 17, 2004 - Report this comment
Just goes to show you... I was so sure she was gonna reach out and slap you with one of them metal, reinforced hands of hers right at the end. Nice one, Paul. Look on the bright side, she can probably do some really cool tricks at parties.
alvin rhodes - December 17, 2004 - Report this comment
half hilarious...half horrifying...all fives
Diddims - December 17, 2004 - Report this comment
Amusing and distrubing at the same time! Not THAT'S a rare quality! I'd be up and running if I ended up hitched to someone like this!
Paul Robinson - December 17, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks to all for the votes & comments...writing this sort of reminded me of an old (1950's) tune by one of those 'folk' type trio's - not sure if it was the Kingston Trio, Chad MItchell, or one of the other ones, but one of them had a song called "He's A Very Unfortunate Man", were this guy was witness to a number of disturbing things about his new wife on their wedding night. I guess this is just an updated scenario.
Know 1 can hear you dream - December 20, 2004 - Report this comment
And this is the opposite side of marriage exactly how? :-)
mac - December 21, 2004 - Report this comment
What Alvin said.
Paul Robinson - February 10, 2005 - Report this comment
Know 1 & mac - belated thanks!

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