She threw up in my bathroom toilet
And not a moment too soon
Another moment in the kitchen
And she would have cleared the room
No one would have helped her
What a sad sight to see!
Monday's lunch all over the table
Tuesday get new carpeting
She said she needed Alka-Seltzer
And that she had too much today
Then she grabbed at my pants zipper
What happened then, I really should not say
And now she lives in my apartment
She doesn't even have a job
And now my mind begins to wonder
If she might be just a lazy slob