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Song Parodies -> "The Pope Resigns"

Original Song Title:

"Wild Honey Pie"

Original Performer:

The Beatles

Parody Song Title:

"The Pope Resigns"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

There hasn't been a papal resignation in nearly 600 years, but amidst intense sex scandals involving pedophiles, denial of sex for priests and nuns (end to celibacy), oridination of women controversy, and Gay rights demands, Pope Benedict XVI is calling it quits by February 28, 2013. Europe's influence is declining in the Church with the highest growth in Latin America and even good growth in Africa. US growth is 4th. So the pressure is on to elect a more progressive Pope with social issues while cracking down on all the sexual scandals around the globe. The German Pope is also citing age and health issues because he is 85. But he has been attacked intensely over the sex scandals in the US and even in Germany. This sets the stage for the election of a possible Latin Pope like Leonardo Sandri of Argentina. The Italian candidate is possibly Angelo Scola. Same set-up as last time with a more realistic chance of success for Latin America.
Scandal cries!
Scandal cries!

Now worldwide
Now worldwide

Peds do slide
Sex denied
Women's pride
Old way dies

Benedict villified

[Traditions swept aside]
Note: 2 years before Ratzinger became Pope I knew he would be b/c he was defender of the faith and John Paul II's right hand. Ratzinger was called "The Panzer Cardinal" and already knew the count of who was for him in advance! This time I cannot foresee who will prevail. The Catholic world wants a more open leader that can address the challenges of the modern world while maintaining the core of Catholic beliefs. Sex issues (of all types) seem to dominate and the question of ordination of women persists...

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   10

User Comments

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Old Man Ribber - February 13, 2013 - Report this comment
Rob - I had never heard the appropriate nickname "Panzer Cardinal", but I think I remember Ratzinger being called "The Holy Rotweiler". What indeed will happen? ;D
Rob Arndt - February 13, 2013 - Report this comment
I'd venture to say that Latin America will be pissed again if the new Pope isn't from there and especially if he's European. Chances of an American Pope- next to zero...
O RLY - February 14, 2013 - Report this comment
Peter Turkson is an early favorite, and my choice if I had any vote in the matter. Watching all these "progressive" fools scream bloody murder and start chanting racist mantras over the election of a for-real black Pope straight from the heart of Africa would be awesome.

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