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Song Parodies -> "My 1040 Form"

Original Song Title:

"When I'm 64"

Original Performer:

The Beatles

Parody Song Title:

"My 1040 Form"

Parody Written by:

Stan Hall

The Lyrics

Come Ides of April when they are due
a few days from now,
if I've sent my taxes to the IRS
hours ahead to duck the duress
that would attend a last-minute send,
that would flout my norm,
but would it win plaudits
or expose to audits
my 1040 form?

If I’m low-profi-i-i-i-i-i-iled,
and if I raise no flags
that will make me smile.

If I stay simple, don't itemize,
use those Forms "EZ,"
will I keep my anonymity so prized
while by "Uncle" I'm sodomized?
I'll gladly pay on all I can't hide
undetectably,
but I’ll be fretting
that someone’s vetting
my Sched’s A thru' D.

Ev'ry April near the middle of the month I am fraught with fear …
are attempts to sha-a-a-a-a-a-ave
and filter income G’s
smart or risk too grave?

Come Ides of April, front of the line
at the midnight hour,
I’ll hand off that big manila envelope
to the postal clerk and then mope.
“I’ll be more speedy, and not as greedy
now and evermore,”
into my beer I’ll
cry but next year I’ll
do just like before.

© Stan Hall ... Hmmm. Security code is "DTS." Not good enough for Meat Loaf, maybe, but 1 out of 3 still ain't bad. :-)

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Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 6

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User Comments

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alvin - April 04, 2008 - Report this comment
EZ to give this fives...especially liked the "plaudits / audits" rhyme
Meriadoc - April 04, 2008 - Report this comment
My accountant still hasn't sent me my taxes... :-(
Peregrin - April 04, 2008 - Report this comment
Gotta love a parody where, even though I am culturally unfamiliar with the exact turns of phrase, it makes perfect sense. Tax, the universal language! Grrr!
John Jenkins - April 04, 2008 - Report this comment
Very good wordplay, and it's good to know that I'm not the only guy getting sodomized by his Uncle this month.
John Barry - April 05, 2008 - Report this comment
I feel great. I'm getting sodomized while Larry Ellison is getting a $3 million tax break because his environmentally egregious mansion has "lost value."
Stan - April 07, 2008 - Report this comment
Thanks, everyone.
JJ - What JB said, and lots more, is the real source of a sense of being sodomized. Almost worth a smile re the central bridge verse here is that the more one might have to hide, the ways one has to creatively hide it in ways strictly for personal benefit. I just wish my own task were tougher that way. IN any case, this is a parody, not an anecdote, confession, lament, etc. :-)

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