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Song Parodies -> "The Ballad Of Hansel And Gretel"

Original Song Title:

"The Ballad Of John And Yoko"

Original Performer:

The Beatles

Parody Song Title:

"The Ballad Of Hansel And Gretel"

Parody Written by:

Alvin Rhodes

The Lyrics

pa said we were gonna go campin'
but we knew there wasn't a chance
our stepmom was whacked
she was a real maniac
we were subjected to her tantrums and rants

christ, you know it ain't easy
that woman's hard as can be
her temper keeps blowin'
that lady terrifies me

papa did his best to prepare us
he must have known this act was insane
he led us away
though he was filled with dismay
"you know, this really ain't my fault", he explained

christ, you know it ain't easy
this ain't the way it should be
but off we are goin'
this forest petrifies me

before too long, our father was ditchin'
survival odds appeared rather bleak
but we used our heads
and dropped some pieces of bread
but little birdies have consumed every piece

christ, you know it ain't easy
but down the road, we must flee
anxiety growin'
location mystifies me

saw a house of gingerbread along the way
decorated oh so merrily
"welcome", the mat said
looked like a nice spread
and so we wandered right into this home
WRONG !

witch was cacklin' like a hyena
still she seemed a kindly ol' hag
but hope turned to dread
this woman wanted us dead
because it turned out eatin' kids was her bag

christ, you know it ain't easy
this lady's crazed as can be
the oven flames' growin'
she wants to cook and fry me

tried to coax us into that oven
but the moment she turned her back
she went in instead
and she was cooked until dead
we roasted her until her skin had turned black

christ, you know it was easy
she wished that she'd left us be
my appetite's growin'
i'm sure she'll satisfy me







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 LittleLots
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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   9
 9
 9
 

User Comments

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zPolak - October 10, 2007 - Report this comment
SO awful!!! wtf
Agrimorfee - October 10, 2007 - Report this comment
Completely covered the story, and gave a Grimm twist at the end. Spot on pacing. 555
Tommy Turtle - October 10, 2007 - Report this comment
Good thing these horror stories are rated R-17, so kids aren't exposed to them! ... well, they should be. "forest petrifies me" lol!
alvin - October 10, 2007 - Report this comment
thanks zpolak, agri and TT
AFW - October 10, 2007 - Report this comment
You're like the Paul Harvey of fairy tales...you give us the REST of the story....very interesting
MrMacphisto - October 10, 2007 - Report this comment
Great job, but I guess Polak decided to strike again.
alvin - October 10, 2007 - Report this comment
thanks AFW and macphisto (oh well)
Below Average Dave (badave.com) - October 10, 2007 - Report this comment
Ones are battle scar marks. . .we all get hit. . .I hit you with 5s though. "the oven flames' growin'" , well as long as it's not my oven, may end up burning poor Hanzel and Gretel for real, "my appetite's growin' i'm sure she'll satisfy me" was a very nice twist on the old story. . .I'd eat the house too if I were them
stuart mcarthur - October 11, 2007 - Report this comment
very very clever, al - I love this sort of thing, finding parallels everywhere etc. - esp. loved the sub "she wants to cook and fry me" - 555
alvin - October 11, 2007 - Report this comment
thanks dave...yeah, that house would have been a more than adequate dessert...thanks stuart....i almost put in "she wants to fricassee me"
PMS - October 14, 2007 - Report this comment
I must echo AFWs comments. Great job as always
alvin - November 17, 2008 - Report this comment
thanks PMS
LittleCUPcakes - November 17, 2008 - Report this comment
Sir Alvin, ~The Mighty Duke 0'Roads~ This reads like a nighmare! A well-told children's tale for sure.
alvin - November 17, 2008 - Report this comment
thanks LittleCUPcakes...glad ya enjoyed

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