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Song Parodies -> "When I've Done Me Chores"

Original Song Title:

"When I'm Sixty Four"

Original Performer:

The Beatles

Parody Song Title:

"When I've Done Me Chores"

Parody Written by:

Tomario

The Lyrics

for every man who's wife has left a list of diy chores .
when it gets colder
fusing my chair
many fears endow
drill and fill and mending sure i shall in time
buffet seating
burr-drill is fine
if i thin out where the mortar should be
could you chalk my saw
will you succeed me
will you still plead me
when i've fixed the floor

you'd be holding flue
and if some sway occurs
i could spray with glue

i could be sanding bending the tubes
then by rights the lawn
you can get it better for your civic pride
someday warning while you preside
gluing to harden riggin the feeds
wear my mask for sure
will you force feed me
can i light speed wee
when i've fixed the door

every plumber circumvents the wattage
i can do it right - as it would appear
we can skim and shave
can drill den in our tree
fear i'm stuck , close shave

mending the post shard
drop my plumb-line
waiting with a screw
syndicating nicely what i'm keen to pay
chores severely working away
sieve out the cancer chillings the norm
fine for parquette floor
will you still gee me
will you still see me
when i've done me chores

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 12

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
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 4   0
 0
 1
 
 5   12
 12
 11
 

User Comments

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Johnny D - June 24, 2006 - Report this comment
Great syllable-matching to the original, excellent rhymes!
Stuart McArthur - June 26, 2006 - Report this comment
"chores severely working away" was great syllable-matching, tomario, as was the rest - I don't usually like these that much (the sacrificing of regular writing rhythms) but I know artistry when I see it, and it was very clever - 555
Michael Pacholek - June 26, 2006 - Report this comment
Chore-tling over your nice work.
Adagio - July 08, 2006 - Report this comment
SOTM Good pacing. I'll take other's words about it....I don't know those technical terms.
wannabemustangjockey - July 08, 2006 - Report this comment
SOTM - This parody works.
Cat - July 11, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Didn't make sense in a couple of points, but had some great subs and was amusing.
Max Power - July 12, 2006 - Report this comment
SOTM-Good
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - July 19, 2006 - Report this comment
SOTM - I'll echo what Johnny D and Cat said. Maybe a list / "name" dropping parody like this needs a bigger bang / pun at the end, but otherwise a really good job.
Matthias - July 24, 2006 - Report this comment
Sounds like a lot of work went into this...
Rick C - July 25, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Nicely done, Tomario. I have done quite a bit in this syllable-matching genre myself.
Red Ant - July 27, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) You are improving rapidly Tomario. This was perfectly formatted, paced, and rhymed. "could you chalk my saw"; heh heh. 5s.
Kristof Robertson - July 27, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) You definitely are getting the hang of this, Tomario! Some LOL moments, great subs...well done. 555
Johnny D - July 28, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) See above --- my praise of the syllable matching & rhyme scheme still stands!
bobpiecheese - July 28, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) DKTOS (as usual, I'm too young to know The Beatles!), but I can sympathise the chore of doing..chores, really. Having a mum does that to you. Nice work.
Stuart McArthur - July 28, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) yes, what I said above, and I also really liked the tight matching of "when i've fixed the floor"
Phil Alexander - July 30, 2006 - Report this comment
Some excellent subs for the OS, but some slightly strained language. Good, but (IMO) could probably have been better.
Arwen - July 31, 2006 - Report this comment
SOTM...when and if I ever get married, I will refuse to give my husband a "To Do List." If he can't read my mind and know what I expect him to do, then he's just going to be in trouble. ; )

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