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Song Parodies -> "Howls From Receding Gums"

Original Song Title:

"House Of The Rising Sun"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

The Animals

Parody Song Title:

"Howls From Receding Gums"

Parody Written by:

Paul Robinson

The Lyrics

Yet another Public Service parody in my "Dental Hygiene" series...
You'll hear some howls coming from me
they're howls from receding gums
Well, they tend to ruin all my eating joy
now all I do is gum

My dentist spoke with candor
He told me I should floss
Yes, he said that if I didn't
It could cause me tooth loss

Now the only stuff that I can eat
Is soup and ground-up mush
I can't eat anything that I must bite
Just stuff that is like slush

~ ~ Dental drill solo ~ ~


It bothers me, a grown man
What I did was very dumb
I failed to take good care of all my teeth
Eating Applesauce makes me glum

Well, I got fitted for some false teeth
But they do not fit too well
Now I must sit in that dentist's chair
To me it is like Hell

So now you hear my tortured screams
caused by receding gums
They're so easily irritated; they annoy
Hope novocaine will numb

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 16

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 2   0
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 3   1
 2
 2
 
 4   1
 0
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 5   14
 14
 13
 

User Comments

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martha - December 06, 2004 - Report this comment
ouch!! hope it gets better!!!
MasonR - December 06, 2004 - Report this comment
Poking fun at gums, eh? Very funny! 555.
Adagio - December 06, 2004 - Report this comment
Nice horror story. 5's
Royce Miller - December 06, 2004 - Report this comment
good luck with all that
Meriadoc - December 06, 2004 - Report this comment
Seems like Paul's going all dental on us.. ;-)
Johnny D - December 06, 2004 - Report this comment
Yeah, you're a regular dental case today, you poor bastard! ;-)
Paul Robinson - December 06, 2004 - Report this comment
Writing parodies about various ailments and miseries serves as a sort of "Mental Floss" for me...at least my brain isn't rotting away...(well, I hope it isn't, anyway...). ~ ~ ~ And of course SOME of this is exaggerated...a bit (or a bite?)...Thanks!!
Stuart McArthur - December 07, 2004 - Report this comment
Alright, I suppose it has to be me who sets up the gag (how come I have to do all the dirty work - sigh)

so! paul! what time was your dental appointment? .............
Paul Robinson - December 07, 2004 - Report this comment
Tooth Hurty, Stu!
alvin rhodes - December 07, 2004 - Report this comment
the dentist should post your songs in his office to scare people...5s
Paul Robinson - December 07, 2004 - Report this comment
alvin, what was really weird was that when I got home from work last night I had a message from the dentist on my answering machine. I'm wondering if I mentioned the site to him in passing and he saw my postings or if it was just some really odd coincidence. Hey, Stu, there was no harm done, but that 12/07 post at 1:36 am was NOT from me...I was safely & snuggly snoozing at that time...
Stuart McArthur - December 07, 2004 - Report this comment
I know, Paul, I did think twice, but then I took a punt on you not minding the gag - I take your point tho :-)
Paul Robinson - December 07, 2004 - Report this comment
No problem...but thanks for clearing it up, I was wondering...

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