Some men like a gal, that’s not too large,
But that’s not really where I get my charge
I like my women with some meat on her legs
A big round bottom that looks like two kegs.

She weighed sixteen tons if she weighed a pound,
Some like em thin, I like em round,
When I went in for a hug and a squeeze,
Her bad breath smelled like moldy cheese…

Well my gal was pretty and she liked to eat,
When we’d go out, she’d take up three seats,
When we’d get the bill it was quite a cost,
When I’d go to hug her I’d always get lost

Well, I woke up one morning and the sun didn’t rise
I thought I was dreamin but to my surprise
My gal came over just to have some fun,
When she stood up, she blocked out the sun,

Well, she had a drinking problem, she was quite a lush,
Once she sat on me, it was quite a crush,
When I gathered my senses I lifted her leg,
And hollered out go see Jenny craig…

Well she went on a diet and it didn’t work
I really did like her but I was kind of a jerk,
I didn’t see us going in love very far,
She just couldn’t fit in my compact car.

Now the moral of the story is it takes all kinds
Some like em skinny, I like big behinds
She was the best girl I’d ever seen,
My sixteen ton lovely beauty queen.