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Song Parodies -> "The Guy With Sleep Apnea"

Original Song Title:

"The Girl From Ipanema"

Original Performer:

Stan Getz and Astrud Gilberto

Parody Song Title:

"The Guy With Sleep Apnea"

Parody Written by:

Rick Cormier

The Lyrics

Like the original, this parody is meant to be sung with a slight Portugese accent. Apnea is pronounced with the stress on the second syllable, instead of on the first.
Short and bald and old and grumpy
The guy with sleep apnea goes driving
And, as he cruises,
Sometimes he snoozes. Uh-ohhhh

When he drives, it's like he's hammered
He swerves hard left, while softly snoring
Some naps he catches
Result in patches. Uh-ohhhh

Oh...but he needs sleep so badly
Ra..cing, headlong t'ward a taxi
Lookslike his end will be messy
Loud snorts wake him in time to avoid
The crash
Cabbie screams, "Hemorrhoid!"

Bleary-eyed and driving drowsy
The guy with sleep apnea is passing
Through "Lawn and Garden" at Sears
But he doesn't see

Oh he is dreaming of boinking
Two blondes in thongs, he's a porn king
Ah he's been bad, someone spank him
Thirty seconds is all that he needs
He's back on the street, he proceeds

Mouth agape and head back, lolling
The guy with sleep apnea is idling
The light is changing to green

But, he never sees
"Cause he's counting sheep
He's catching some zees
He drives fast asleep

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 18

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 2   0
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 3   0
 0
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 4   0
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 5   18
 18
 18
 

User Comments

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AFW - June 27, 2006 - Report this comment
Great title idea and "Sound-Like" phrase...Very funny, loved the "Sears, Lawn and garden" line..Conjures up an image of Mr. Magoo in a car....Did you have Patrick Kennedy in mind?..I'm apt to give you "5's"
Ravyn Rant - June 27, 2006 - Report this comment
I think I dated that guy. 555
alvin rhodes - June 27, 2006 - Report this comment
only fell asleep once reading it....wonderful concept
Johnny D - June 27, 2006 - Report this comment
Heh heh
Kristof Robertson - June 27, 2006 - Report this comment
5s for the brilliant title alone...I'm shooting the video in my head already!
John Barry - June 27, 2006 - Report this comment
What Kristof said about the title. This parody getz you fives.
Adagio - June 27, 2006 - Report this comment
hehe hehe
Johnny D - June 27, 2006 - Report this comment
chortle snort sssnnrrrrzzzzk
Spaff.com - June 27, 2006 - Report this comment
I can totally relate; I have those same dreams. Kudos on everything here, particularly the title.
Stuart McArthur - June 27, 2006 - Report this comment
LMAO Rick - "Oh… he is dreaming of boinking Two… blondes in thongs, he's a porn king" ('out' of thongs, I presume you meant, but it wouldn't have paced) - very creative and wacky - just like you, mate ;-) - 555
Rick C - June 27, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks, AFW, Ravyn, alvin, JD, Kristof, John A. Barry, Adagio, JD again?, Mr.com and Stu. Stu, I'm sure he would have helped them out, had he lasted more than 30 seconds :-)
Matthias - September 19, 2006 - Report this comment
That was gr............................ zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.......................... -yawns, awakes- Great
Agrimorfee - September 20, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC3) I had trouble singing my way through stanza 3, but otherwise great idea and execution.
Michael McVey - September 21, 2006 - Report this comment
Definitely funny -- and true!--MM
tomario - September 24, 2006 - Report this comment
loved it nuff z
Red Ant - September 25, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC3G) Rick, you know I love, love, LOVE your work, but this one (and only this one) just didn't do it for me. But, it's not your writing, it's that my sense of humor is skewed on the subject since my wife is hooked to a machine to help her breath (she has sleep apnea), and I've darned near been killed more than once from falling asleep at the wheel (just really friggin' tired and too damned stupid to stop for rest).

That said, the pacing is great, and so were the lines "Oh… he is dreaming of boinking/Two… blondes in thongs, he's a porn king"
Johnny D - September 25, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC) 10cm CPAP, see above!
Cat - September 25, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC-G) This definitely wasn't a snorefest! Had me grinning the whole way.
Stuart McArthur - September 25, 2006 - Report this comment
(abc3-g) loved this one - see above, and LOL for your reply, Rick
Kristof Robertson - September 27, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC3G) see above. I remember this one well. Great stuff!
Rick C - September 29, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks all.

Agri: I suppose I should have marked the verses and choruses to eliminate that confusion. Sorry.

Sorry to have hit a nerve, Jack, I understand.

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