Maybe you think I'm out 'til almost three,
With one girl on each arm in NYC.
And maybe you thing I'm clubbing with the youth.
It'd hurt me if you only knew the truth.
I'm sittin' home on Friday night.
The lights are off, the TV's shining bright.
Until you feel like callin' me - should you get the notion,
I'm watching Wheel Of Fortune.

Maybe you think I'm bored watching TV,
But Vanna White's the only girl for me.
I haven't had a date since '92.
Oh what's a couch potato-boy to do?
Ain't it a sin - I'm surfin on the TV dial.
Pat Sajak's gonna make me smile.
If - I was on my favorite show - I know that I'd be winning dough.
I'm - watching "Wheel of Fortune".

Maybe you wonder what I'm gonna do,
When Wheel Of Fortune for tonight is through.
Will I be bored the balance of the night?
Don't worry 'bout me, 'cause I'll tell you why.
Spin it again - I've got reruns on video,
And there's no place where I have gotta go.
So, you know where you can find me - Propped in front of my TV,
I'm - watching Wheel Of Fortune.

So - if you feel like stopping by - You'll find out how I spend my nights.
I'm - watching Wheel Of Fortune.