My friends were always putting her down, down, down
Because she was the ugliest woman in town
I met her at the local store
She was sleeping in front of the front door
That's when I fell for the leader of the pack.

My mother said go find somebody new, new, new
This woman's far too ugly for you
She says all the neighbors talk
When I take her out for her walk
They don't understand her, the leader of the pack.

Her face is covered over with scars, scars, scars
From chasing one too many parked cars
I took her to the park with me
She learned how to catch a frisbee
I love to play fetch with my leader of the pack.

She gives me chills when I hear her bark, bark, bark
Her new flea collar glows in the dark
I tell them she's what dreams are made of
They say it's only puppy love
I sure love petting my leader of the pack.

Tomorrow to this girl I'll be wed, wed, wed
Even though she sleeps at the end of the bed
I just hope this time she doesn't beg
Or try to dance with my leg
There's no one else like her, my leader of the pack.