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Song Parodies -> "Only The Phone-Free"

Original Song Title:

"Only The Lonely"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Roy Orbison

Parody Song Title:

"Only The Phone-Free"

Parody Written by:

The Comedian

The Lyrics

For an audio sample of "Only The Lonely", go to the following Amazon web page, scroll down to "Listen to Samples", and click on the link for "Only The Lonely". If simply clicking on the link doesn't work, try this: right-click on the link to "Only The Lonely", pull down to "Properties", cut-and-paste the URL of the sound-file into your browser's address bar, hit Enter, and then click the "Go" button to the right of your browser's address bar: ............. http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/B0000026T0/102-1277249-8719340?v=glance ............ And ............. here's an MP3 of a totally different part of the song ....... http://music.walmart.com/m/007/24/38/42/35/02/0072438423502.01.01.001.mp3 ........ And ....... here's a URL that links to an excellent quality MIDI sound file of the entire song ......... http://users.cis.net/sammy/onlythel.htm
No dumb thumb fumblin'-'n-th'-car
No swervin' here-an'-there
No goin' "OOHHH-NO" 'n th' car
Only the phone-free
Only the phone-free

Only the phone-free (No - )

( - dumb thumb fumblin'-'n-th'-car)

Know the way to drive that's right (No - )

(- swervin' here-an'-there)

Only the phone-free (No - )

( - dumb thumb fumblin'-'n-th'-car)

Don't ignore each red light (No - )

( - dumb thumb fumblin'-'n-th'-car)


There goes another
(dumb! dumb! dumb! dumb!)

Cell-phoning stiff
(dumb! dumb! dumb! dumb!)

Talking and driving
(dumb! dumb! dumb! dumb!)

Right off a cliff
(dumb! dumb! dumb! dumb!)


But o-o-only
The phone-free

Sur-vive

Their drive

Only the phone-free (No - )

- dumb thumb fumblin'-'n-th'-car
No swervin' here-an'-there
No goin' "OOHHH-NO" 'n th' car
Only the phone-free
Only the phone-free

Only the phone-free (No - )

( - dumb thumb fumblin'-'n-th'-car)

Know the disc brakes I've gone through (No - )

( - swervin' here-an'-there)

Only the phone-free (No - )

( - dumb thumb fumblin'-'n-th'-car)

Know I drive, in fright, it's true (No - )

( - dumb thumb fumblin'-'n-th'-car)


When will those dumb ones
(dumb! dumb! dumb! dumb!)

Stop tempting death?
(dumb! dumb! dumb! dumb!)

End their fumblin'?
(dumb! dumb! dumb! dumb!)

Don't hold your breath!
(dumb! dumb! dumb! dumb!)


YOOOOU'VE ...
GOT TO BRAKE !

When
THEIR
Phonely carts break!

Only the phone-free...

(No dumb thumb fumblin'-'n-th'-car...)

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 LittleLots
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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   6
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 6
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

mac - February 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Yeah, those driving cell phoners are real jerks. :(
Adagio - February 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Really good, Johnny! 5's
Chris - February 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Good job Johnny. 5 stars. I have just added a new Shania Twain parody to the Shania Twain section that I think you would enjoy. There is even a link to a sample of the original song. Any comments or votes would be graciously appreciated. This is a parody of "Whose Bed Has Your Boots Been Under?" and although it says written by "Twain/Lange", it was ofcourse written by me.
Jack Wilson - February 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Great job, JOhnny!
Johnny D - February 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, mac, Adagio, Chris, and Jack!
Jack Wilson - February 29, 2004 - Report this comment
BTW I have a new parody today : http://www.amiright.com/parody/60s/brianhyland4.shtml
Guy - February 29, 2004 - Report this comment
I'm callin' in three fives from my cell phone while driving rush hour.
Johnny D - February 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks Guy - now back to keeping your eyes on the road!
Birgitta - February 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Johnny,LOVE the energy here.It's a fun one! Some day I'll be up with the Jones' & get a cell phone myself,lol. GJ
Rick D - February 29, 2004 - Report this comment
My job just got me one of those damn things. I called Mari on it to tell her and she laughed for five minutes. Good thing I'm not paying for them.
Johnny D - February 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks Birgitta and Rick. Birgitta, when you get one - and Rick, now that you have one - you'll soon wonder what life would be like without one...... notice I'm not saying either for good or for bad.... LOL !
Jay W - February 29, 2004 - Report this comment
"Phonley carts" , huh? Coincidence that the reason for these idiots transportating and communicating at the same time is that they're lonely? You continue to put out really clever stuff.
Johnny D - February 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks Jay - I like your insight about the subject(s) of this satire!
Paul Robinson - February 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Johnny D - Nice job. I'm surprised that the Ads that post on the right-side of the screen didn't have any Cell Phone Ads.
Verizon - February 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Can U hear me now??
Johnny D - February 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks Paul R.! And Verizon - loud and clear!
alvin rhodes - March 02, 2004 - Report this comment
5s....a subject near and dear to me....
Johnny D - March 02, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks Alvin.
Red Ant - September 28, 2005 - Report this comment
(O) Dumb indeed,(or as Carlos Mencia might say "Dee Dee Deee") I'm not for more laws but driving while on a cell phone needs to be banned.
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - September 29, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) Great concept, great rhymes. As if Crazy Frog wasn't incentive enough to ban mobile phones forever.
Dominic L. - September 29, 2005 - Report this comment
I thought it was an awesome parody, fives for you man
Agrimorfee - September 30, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC05) A real treasure, loved the graphic representation of the backing vocals...added a lot. 555
Rick D - September 30, 2005 - Report this comment
A little off topic, but I really wanted to fly out to your show and hang out with you and Rick C. Maybe that convention we keep talking about could be held somewhere near you and we just might
Kristof Robertson - October 04, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) Written well before my time, JD...but absolutely delightful! Gotta love those Big O parodies...555
Stuart McArthur - October 04, 2005 - Report this comment
(O) not often I can say this, but that parody made me want to be a better man - or a better driver at least - or a phone-free one at least
Saider E. - October 06, 2005 - Report this comment
(O) Can't resist, 555
Scathe - October 09, 2005 - Report this comment
(O) Clever and biting.

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