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Song Parodies -> "King Arthur Barked"

Original Song Title:

"MacArthur Park"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Richard Harris

Parody Song Title:

"King Arthur Barked"

Parody Written by:

The Comedian

The Lyrics

Sword was ever waiting in the stone
No man could pull it forth
Many failed and left glumly

Between squires and pages Arthur pressed
He gloved hot gleaming iron
Excalibur sprung free


King Arthur barked,
"I'm waiting in the dark --- for my favorite Page to blow me now"

Merlin left a snake-snout in the rain

Then with eye of newt he baked it
And he told the King to take it
'Cause it's Merlin's magic recipe for men
Oh-ho!


Arthur loved the yellow silken dress
Foaming like a wave
Guinnevere wore 'mongst the trees

Yet still, the tender Pages he'd command
And those young boys obeyed falling on their knees


King Arthur's Page
Has knelt there in the dark --- on that Kingly Knight he's going down

Merlin left a snake-snout in the rain

Then with eye of newt he baked it
And he told the King to take it
'Cause it's Merlin's magic recipe for men
Oh-ho!


"There will be another dong for me,
For it's my Kingdom
There will be another Page for me,
Someone will bring him
You will drink my wine while it is warm,
And never let me catch you looking at me, son,
But after all the loves of my wife,
After all the loves of my wife,
You're still much more fun."

"I will take my wife into my arms and we will make it
I will win the worship of her eyes but I will fake it
I will have the things that I desire
And my passion flow like rivers through the sky.
But during all the loves of my wife,
During all the loves of my wife,
I'll be thinking of you,
My young Page-boy guy."


(long instrumental)


King Arthur parked
His gelding in the dark --- for Sir Lancelot to bugger-down

Lady Of The Lake shouts "You're insane!"

"You're no King, you're just a Satyr!"
But those words made Arthur hate her
So he drained the frickin' Lake that she lived in
"Oh-ho!"
"Drain-oh!"
"Go blow!"
"You ho!"

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   7
 7
 7
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Royce Miller - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Johnny, you've outdone yourself
Johnny D - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Royce, thank you! ;-D
Royce Miller - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Johnny, this is now my favorite parody of yours..and that's alot of parodies
John Barry - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Genius!
Royce Miller - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
one more comment from me--I'd love to hear Donna Summer sing this one!
Arwen - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Hmph! I don't think IKTOS...=(
SirLee Ojay - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Twisted
Johnny D - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Royce (2 more times!): Thanks again!!

John Barry: Aw shucks, thanks!

Arwen: Thanks for stopping by ---- but if you don't already know "MacArthur Park", take it from the rest of us --- DON'T INFLICT IT UPON YOURSELF !!

"MacArthur Park" has a well-deserved reputation as being the WORST pop-music disaster of all time.... Check out Dave Barry's "The Worst Songs of All Time":

http://www.popculturemadness.com/Music/WORST-Dave-Barry.htm­l
"But now for our survey results. Without question, the voters' choice for Worst Song -- in both the Worst Overall AND Worst Lyrics category -- is ... (drum roll ...) MacArthur Park, as sung by Richard Harris, and later remade, for no comprehensible reason, by Donna Summer. It's hard to argue with this selection. My 12-year-old son, Rob, was going through a pile of ballots, and he asked me how MacArthur Park goes, so I sang it, giving it my best shot, and Rob laughed so hard that when I got to the part about leaving the cake out in the rain, and it took so long to bake it, and I'll never have that recipe again, Rob was on the floor. He didn't BELIEVE those lyrics were real. He was SURE his wacky old humor-columnist dad was making them up."
Johnny D - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
SirLee Ojay: Thank you, Fellow Knight of The Clown-Table!
LadiLoca - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
King John, I beseech thee...how in the name of justice do you come UP with this stuff?!? Funny, in a sick, twisted way...just the way I like it. 5's.
Arwen - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
OH MY HELL!?! It's the "someone left the cake out in the rain" song??? Why am I being schooled on actual titles so much this week? I TOTALLY know this song...5s, Mister D...
Ashkicksass - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
I've never heard it. Dammit, Johnny, stop doing songs I don't know!
Johnny D - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
LadiLoca: Mi'Lady, 'tis a sweet mystery to me as well. Thanks!

Queen Arwen: King John says thank you too, Your Highness!

Ashkicksass: Thanks for stopping by, Ashkicksass ... but if you and I both stopped doing songs the other doesn't know, we wouldn't be doing half the songs we are!

( P.S. Good people of the realm .... someone's vote didst not registereth....)
Johnny D - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Ooops, forgive me, good people of the realm, yonder vote appeareth to have been casteth!
Jack Wilson - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Someone voted fives out in the rain, to this parody, and thats me!
Johnny D - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Thank you, Sir Jack of Wilsonia !
Johnny D - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
I just realized that there's an unintentional irony happening here ....... "MacArthur Park" was originally sung by the actor Richard Harris ...... and ....... the actor Richard Harris played KING ARTHUR in the movie-musical "Camelot". I didn't consciously realize that ironic connection between Richard Harris and this parody's title & theme until just now.
Lady Leola Jayne Schwartz - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Ah-HAH! You know, as I was reading through this, I kept imagining Harris as Arthur, but didn't stop to wonder why -- I just assumed it was because he's an actor...
Ashkicksass - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
I thought that was why you wrote it...
Arwen - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
I'm with Ash...when I realized that I DID know the song...I was crediting you with even MORE cleverness...considering the Harris/Arthur connection. *sigh* Richard Harris...he'll always be my one and only Dumbledore...
Paul Robinson - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Johnny D - I think this one may have "XXX-Caliber" connotations. Hey, do me a favor and be careful where you stick that saber. I heard a rumor that King Arthur's penchant for bending his Pages over forestalled the invention of the Bookmark for almost 100 years. This parody is ever so largely lucid, unlike the original song. 5's
Sir Richard - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Just Johnny D's extra-conscious genius at work. Just happens -- he doesn't even have to try...
alvin rhodes - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
thank you for improving a crappy crappy crappy crappy crappy crappy crappy crappy crappy song...did i mention i thought the original was crappy ?
Meriadoc - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Well, I've never read any Arthurian legends or romances - guess I must really be missing something! ;-) (And Johnny - you just gave me a great idea of another really crappy OS to parody...) :-D
not a prude, but... - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
sorry, i just think it would have been funnier if it was more subtle, and not so crude, more inuendo and double entendre than, "King Arthur barked, "I'm waiting in the dark --- for my favorite Page to blow me now" from the votes and comments, i'm guessing it's just me
Johnny D - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Lady Leola Jayne Schwartz: Wow, so you picked up the unconscious Harris-connection too!

Ashkicksass & Arwen: Nope, mi'ladies, I truly did not consciously realize the irony until after I posted the parody.

Paul: I dub thee Sir Raunchalot! Thank you!

Sir Richard: Thank you, Sir Richard...do you come from the highlands of Scotland, by any chance?

alvin: I'm happy happy happy happy to have been of service! Thanks!

Meriadoc: Thanks, and you've intrigued me!

not a prude, but... : I acknowledge your opinion, okay, whatever. Are you "aoid" ? You sure sound like him....just curious, that's all. Thanks for taking the time to write a comment.
Cookie-man - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
I am AMAZED every time I read another one of your parodies. Each seems to be even better than the last! This is GREAT! I think you may have a hard time topping this one...... 555
Johnny D - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, Cookie-man! ;-D
Ahnonamis - July 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Another great parody, JD. Maybe I should start telling people on my parodies that I'm your cousin or something...maybe that will get me more votes ;)
Johnny D - July 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Thank you, Ahnonamis! ;-)
Lord Pacholek of the Meadowlands - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Forsooth! Thou hast scraped the bottom of the moral barrel and again thou emergest smelling like a rose! And explainest why Queen Guinevere doth the most honored knight lance a lot, for her husband 'twas otherwise occupied. At this rate, John, we're gonna have to start calling you Daddy Macbeth! Paul, for that joke, they oughta take you to central booking.
Johnny D - July 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Lord Pacholek of the Meadowlands, thou dost honoreth me-eth very-eth much-eth. Thankethhhhhhhhhh you! ;-D
Spaff.com - July 31, 2004 - Report this comment
Splendid, Sir Dangle. You sure use your Lancelot. And alvin's comment made me laugh.
Johnny D - July 31, 2004 - Report this comment
Thank you, Mr. Spafford!
Agrimorfee - August 03, 2004 - Report this comment
How could I miss this the first time? What poetry! 555!! BTW, there is some nice synchronicity in this-- you might know that Richard Harris had portrayed King Arthur in the film version of "Camelot" and a later stage version. Now we *certainly* know that King Arthur did indeed "Camelot"!
Johnny D - August 04, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, Agrimorfee!
Royce Miller - August 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Restoring my 5's
Johnny D - August 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Thank you, Mi'Lady.
Amanda Holt - October 28, 2004 - Report this comment
it is so sexy
Johnny D - October 28, 2004 - Report this comment
Glad you liked it, Amandabandabobanda! Thanks!
Red Ant - July 19, 2005 - Report this comment
Saw your comment today regarding this parody. I proudly say DKTOS and don't care to. I know your pacing is virtually flawless and this is funny and twisted so 5s here, but PLEASE don't change your mind and enter this in the K round. =)
stuart mcarthur - October 07, 2005 - Report this comment
Truly Johnny D-ian - LOL - the insights I've now gained into Camelot are unforgettable (no matter how hard I try - a little like the OS!) - 555

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