Song Parodies -> Hermione's Heart
| Original Song Title: | "MacArthur's Park" |
| Original Performer: | Richard Harris |
| Parody Song Title: | "Hermione's Heart" |
| Parody Written by: | agtb |
Ron was never waiting for you, girl
He ran with Lavender
As you cried out in distress
Between the hundred pages that you read
Your potion smelled like Ron
Like a game of Wizard’s Chess
Hermione's heart is breaking at Hogwarts
All evil pure bloods pushing her around
Someone left her packed trunk on the train
I don't think that she can take it
'Cause it took so long to pack it
And she'll never have that history book again
Oh, no!
I recall the time that you were kissed
His name was Viktor Krum
At the ball ‘round Christmas Eve
Her friends, who would not lend their sweaty hands
To their dating Patil partners, who were twins
Hermione's heart is breaking at Hogwarts
All evil pure bloods pushing her around
Someone left her packed trunk on the train
I don't think that she can take it
'Cause it took so long to pack it
And she'll never have that history book again
Oh, no!
[break]
There will be another spell for me
For I will say it
There will be another A for me
For I will force it
I will drink whiskey while it’s on fire
And never let you catch me snogging Mr. Krum
And after all the grades of my life
After all the wands of my life
You'll still be Won-Won
I will take my book into my hands and I will read it
I will wave my wand into his eyes and he will break it
I will have the A’s that I desire
And kill Voldy if required by and by
And after all the grades of my life
After all the wands of my life
I'll be cursing at you
And making you DIE!
[extended break]
Hermione's heart is breaking at Hogwarts
All evil pure bloods pushing her around
Someone left her packed trunk on the train
I don't think that she can take it
'Cause it took so long to pack it
And she'll never have that history book again
Oh, no!
He ran with Lavender
As you cried out in distress
Between the hundred pages that you read
Your potion smelled like Ron
Like a game of Wizard’s Chess
Hermione's heart is breaking at Hogwarts
All evil pure bloods pushing her around
Someone left her packed trunk on the train
I don't think that she can take it
'Cause it took so long to pack it
And she'll never have that history book again
Oh, no!
I recall the time that you were kissed
His name was Viktor Krum
At the ball ‘round Christmas Eve
Her friends, who would not lend their sweaty hands
To their dating Patil partners, who were twins
Hermione's heart is breaking at Hogwarts
All evil pure bloods pushing her around
Someone left her packed trunk on the train
I don't think that she can take it
'Cause it took so long to pack it
And she'll never have that history book again
Oh, no!
[break]
There will be another spell for me
For I will say it
There will be another A for me
For I will force it
I will drink whiskey while it’s on fire
And never let you catch me snogging Mr. Krum
And after all the grades of my life
After all the wands of my life
You'll still be Won-Won
I will take my book into my hands and I will read it
I will wave my wand into his eyes and he will break it
I will have the A’s that I desire
And kill Voldy if required by and by
And after all the grades of my life
After all the wands of my life
I'll be cursing at you
And making you DIE!
[extended break]
Hermione's heart is breaking at Hogwarts
All evil pure bloods pushing her around
Someone left her packed trunk on the train
I don't think that she can take it
'Cause it took so long to pack it
And she'll never have that history book again
Oh, no!
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User Comments Follow...
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Imperio! Now, don't write any more parodies like this! And if you do, make them a LOT better. This was terrible, bad rhymes, made no sense, it was about as much fun as a quidditch game with paid-off referees!
I won't be as acidic as Mr. Pacholek, but yeah, this fell apart after the "(break)". Unless there was something new in Book 7 (which I haven't finished), Hermione NEVER calls him "Won-won". Parodying MacArthur Park well around here requires great creative skill--this was a bit thrown together.
Well, I liked this. I love to dis the sacred cows.
Don't fret about Mr Pacholek's comment, atgb...he must've got out of bed on the wrong side. ;-) There's potential here, but you need to take more time getting everything right. 544
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This is view # 355
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