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Song Parodies -> "Downtown"

Original Song Title:

"Downtown"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Petula Clark

Parody Song Title:

"Downtown"

Parody Written by:

Onslaught

The Lyrics

This is one I wrote some time ago. I thought "downtown" isn't like that any more, if it ever was. The original lyrics were a bit more crude, so I cleaned it up a bit and here it is.
Down Town

The mayor of your town
Is the biggest crook
That you have ever seen, downtown
Raking in all of
Your tax money, man
That is really obscene, downtown

He’s begging for your vote
Every two years in the election.
You haven’t got a prayer,
Cause there’s not much of a selection

Wait and see,
He says one thing,
And does another,
Gives all the city contracts to his brother

Downtown, everything stinks when you’re
Downtown, it’s worse than you think it is
Downtown, you’d better stay away from
(Downtown)

All of the prostitutes
Have their health cards
Certified every year, downtown
You can even
Find some action
If you happen to be queer, downtown

You can buy a condom
And the penicillin’s cheap
And they’ll sell them both to you
From the back of a jeep

Go Ahead,
You pays yo’ money
You takes yo’ chances
You can try Mabel, or maybe Francis

Downtown, everything stinks when you’re
Downtown, it’s worse than you think it is
Downtown, you’d better stay away from
(Downtown)

(I decided there needed to be more examples of how bad it is downtown so in place of the instrumental piece, a third verse.)

The muggers are
Friendly and courteous
As they steal all your pay, downtown
The drug dealers say
That they have just
What you need to end a rotten day, downtown

The looters and the shooters all
Run wild in the street
There’s potential for mayhem
From everyone you meet

Run and hide
Go to you homes and
Block the doorway
But you may not be
Safe there some say,

Downtown, everything stinks when you’re
Downtown, it’s worse than you think it is
Downtown, you’d better stay away from
(Downtown


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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   3
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Patrick - March 01, 2011 - Report this comment
So, you've been to Kansas City, Kansas, too. Surprised I haven't met you yet. A couple weeks ago the police chief donned a bulletproof vest and carried a machinegun to arrest several of his own officers. The news media is speculating, but everyone in town knows they have been ripping off money and dope from the drug dealers and keeping the loot for themselves. A much parodied tune, but quite fitting. See my version of "Green Green Grass of Home" for my take on the topic.

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