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Song Parodies -> "If I Had A Stammer"

Original Song Title:

"If I Had A Hammer"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Peter, Paul, & Mary

Parody Song Title:

"If I Had A Stammer"

Parody Written by:

Lionel Mertens

The Lyrics

Dear Pathing Powice, If you would you pwease let me go with only a warning on this pardoy I would be much abliged. Thanx.


If I had a stuh… stuh… st… stammer
I’d stuh… st… stammer in the daytime
I’d stuh… st… stammer in the nighttime
Try to under s… st.. sstand

I’d stuh… stuh… st… stammer out suh su… slowly
I’d stuh… stuh… st… stammer out qwuh… quickly
I’d suh… stammer out st… stuff and you’d wonder what I uh…. Uuuh uttered
Try to under s… st.. sstand

If I had a lisp
I’d be talking un-cwisply
I’d be talking like ‘tis thee’
Try to underthstaaannd

I’d tawk like [Mike] Tython
I’d talk like Chuck Norwis
I’d be sownding just like ol’ Cha-rles Nelthon Wiley
Try to underthstaaand


If I had a draaawl
Y’all be thinkin’ I’m Texan
I’d be twangin’ while speaCAN
Try to under-staand

Ya’ll ’d call me country
Ya’ll ’d call me a bumpkin
Ya’ll ‘d say I was a-kissin’ my sisters and my cousins
Try to under-staand

Well I got a stuh… stuh… st… stammer
And I got a lisp
And I got a drawl to boot, try to understand

With a stammer so stuh… stuh… st… strainful
And a lisp so painful
Plus a drawl so gosh darn bad it’s a wonder you would lithen
Try to underthstaaand

{REPEAT LAST VOISE (I mean verse)}

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 0
 
 2   0
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 3   0
 0
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 4   0
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 5   5
 5
 5
 

User Comments

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MrMacphisto - November 22, 2007 - Report this comment
This left me thpeechleth... 5-5-5
Phil Alexander - November 22, 2007 - Report this comment
V- v- v-ewy guh- guh g-g-good
alvin - November 22, 2007 - Report this comment
you've said a mouthful...brilliant concept
Lionel Mertens - November 22, 2007 - Report this comment
Th... th... thanks Uh uh alvin, Ph... Phhilll, ah... ah.. and Muh Muh Mister Muh mu Macphisto.
PMS - November 22, 2007 - Report this comment
Th-three f-f-fives
Roger Wood - November 22, 2007 - Report this comment
Vewy cwever - whats an impediment between fwends?

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