Verse
Yesterday I had a driving licence
I would drive my motor car all day
Then I hit this roundabout in Fareham
And now they've gone and taken it away............
(TAKEN AWAY.......)

Chorus
Those were the days My friend
Me and my four wheeled friend
We'd drive around, forever and a day
So many pubs to choose and drinking too much booze
Don't drink and drive
They'll take your car away
la la la la la la etc

I met this girl in Purbrook called Fiona
She would say to me 'Lay off the beer'
What with her and my old Auntie Linda
And the magistrates voice ringing in my ear.......
( DON'T DRINK AND DRIVE........)

Chorus
Lay off the beer tonight
It spoils your appetite
It eats your brain cells slowly, one by one
Stay off the lager man, just have a Barbican
Don't drink and drive
Cos walking's not much fun
La la la la la la .......etc

(sad) Verse
I saw this flashing blue light in my mirror
It overtook me and it pulled me in
Two men in black approached me in my motor
They said that they could detect the smell of gin.............
(THE SMELL OF GIN...................)

Chorus
Blow in the bag my son
You'll be the ninth we've done
I watched the crystals turn from blue to green
Jump in the car with us, its bloody obvious
We've got to stop you driving this machine
la la la la la la la etc

Verse
My head was spinning round inside the station
I don't remember singing in the pub
They said that they'd get in touch with my relations
Just as soon as they'd a sample of my blood
(SAMPLE OF BLOOD....................)

Chorus
You must've drunk a bit
This bloods got a 'head' on it
We're gonna send it off, it won't take long
The poice analysist confirmed that I was p***ed
It came back labelled 'Carlsberg Extra Strong'
la la la la la la la .... .....etc

Stay off the lager sir,
Just have a Kaliber
Don't drink and drive they'll take your car away
Don't drink and drive cos walking's not much fun
Don't drink and drive because you will get done