"Souper Sally … "

(brief musical intro)

Hey, piddle-diddle fun’s in this parody.
What’s piddle-diddle fun? Read and see …

(Now,) Hooker Sally has a tic, it’s peeing while she close is.
Her pimp jokes “Sal, dat bed you use, dat ain’t no bed o’ roses
an’ wat’ring what be planted dere, dat ain’t da job a ho’s is!”
Hooker Sally has a tic, it’s peeing while she close is.

Hey, piddle-diddle Sal’s a two-fer gal!
Hey, piddle-diddle Sal’s a two-fer gal!

Now, Sally is a working gal
and, tho’ good at her job,
she has a little quirk, does Sal,
that sometimes is a prob.
See, Sally doesn’t simply sweat --
when Sally feels that throb,
the flood she frees leaves soaking wet
her client and his knob.

(So,) Two-fer Sally has a tic, it’s peeing while she close is --
a most unwelcome finish for some johns whom she thus hoses
and sloppy-seconds freebie flops her recompense to those is.
Two-fer Sally has a tic, it’s peeing while she close is.

Hey, piddle-diddle Sal’s a souper gal!
Hey, piddle-diddle Sal’s a souper gal!

She’s sorry hers can’t help but be
a watery climax --
the bladder that won’t hold her pee
will on its own relax.
She’s thankful that her pimp’s a pal
with patience who won’t axe
her and for clients who say, “Sal,
we’ve got each other’s backs.”

(And) Souper Sally has a tic, it’s peeing while she close is
A “raincoat” worn for safe sex has two meanings, one supposes,
when trysting with our soggy Sal, but all one really knows is
Souper Sally has a tic, it’s peeing while she close is

Hey, piddle-diddle Sal’s a dew-furred gal!
Hey, piddle-diddle Sal’s a dew-furred gal!

Now, Sally is a much-loved dish
among the working chicks.
She’s never found it hard to fish
for Harrys, Toms or Dicks.
Nobody ever calls her b*itch
tho’ she has lots of nicks,
and Sally’s piddle-diddle glitch
has never cost her tricks.

(But) Dew-furred Sally’s tragic tic is peeing while she close is
Some whose favored form of fun those “just-sub-seven-ohs”** is
have near drowned when, upside down, our Sally's filled their noses.
Dew-furred Sally’s tragic tic is peeing while she close is.


(brief musical coda)