Song Parodies -> See Cretaceous Man

Original Song Title:	"Secret Agent Man"
Original Performer:	Johnny Rivers

Parody Song Title:	"See Cretaceous Man"
Parody Written by:	Johnny D

In the Late Cretaceous Period, about 70 million years ago, there existed a variety of primates, the "Haplorini", from which some scientists theorize hominids arose - and from which this parody most definitely arose.

Haplorini was an ancient primate
And every plant he'd meet, he probably ate
With every clue he gave
From fossils in his cave -
Odds are his braincase was mostly hollow

See Cretaceous Man!
See Cretaceous Man!
He's walkin' on his knuckles,
And growin' a bigger brain

Beware of pretty fossils that you find
A pretty stone can fool the brightest mind
Ah, beware what you conclude
From that fossilized ape food -
Odds are you'll be eatin' it tomorrow

See Cretaceous Man!
See Cretaceous Man!
He's swingin' from the branches,
And swattin' them bugs in vain

(electric guitar - instrumental bridge)

See Cretaceous Man!
See Cretaceous Man!
He's eatin' them bananas,
And munchin' the barley grain

Swingin' on the cocoanut tree one day
And then matin' with some Haplorini next day
On a banana peel he slipped,
Fell over and broke his hip -
The odds are he won't live to see tomorrow

See Cretaceous Man!
See Cretaceous Man!
He's pissin' in the jungle,
And markin' off his domain

(electric guitar riff)

See Cretaceous Man!

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royce miller - November 20, 2003 - Report this comment

Johnny-you put alot of work into this, it looks like-great job; you're not from Texas, are you?

Johnny D - November 20, 2003 - Report this comment

Thanks for the kind words Royce. Nope, I'm not from Texas - I'm from The People's Republic Of Taxachusetts.

Paul Robinson - November 20, 2003 - Report this comment

Johnny, yeah!! Like it a lot. Literate, but not stuffy. Absolutely perfect pace. Was chuckling out loud reading it. I'm gonna recommend some people here at work take a gander at it. Only flaw - (smallest of small) "coconut". Straight 5-5-5 score.

Melhi - November 20, 2003 - Report this comment

Nice job, Johnny D.

Meriadoc - November 20, 2003 - Report this comment

Great one Johnny! (And looks like one of the above forgot to vote, as I know none of them voted 1's...? )

Johnny D - November 20, 2003 - Report this comment

Thanks Meriadoc! And thank you for your comments and almost all of your votes, Royce, Paul, and Melhi.......now......like Meriadoc said.....which one of you good people ( Royce, Paul, and Melhi ) forgot to record your vote here for our fossilized Haplorini friend ( LOL ) ?

Rice Cube - November 20, 2003 - Report this comment

HAHAHA!

Hey, who the hell gave you straight ones? >:-(

Adagio - November 20, 2003 - Report this comment

Guess it wasn't me that didn't vote...I gave you 5's :D Btw, Clever title!!

Melhi - November 20, 2003 - Report this comment

I tried voting again and it wouldn't take, so it wasn't me.

Rick D - November 21, 2003 - Report this comment

Got in late. I voted. The averages went up. Now I go kill wooly mammoth. Ugh.

Johnny D - November 21, 2003 - Report this comment

Thank you Rick, Melhi, Adagio, and Rice Cube. And Rick - Here. Take club. Bring stone. Use to kill mammoth. Ugh.

Paul Robinson - November 22, 2003 - Report this comment

Johnny D - The missed vote thing, Guilty! I've done this a couple times now; filled in the votes and then went and made comments BEFORE submitting the vote. I apologize and am correcting that omission right after sending this, I PROMISE. I'm gonna have to get on-line at home, I've been trying to enter submissions, check my stuff and read some other people's efforts while I'm at work. If I can remember who else I unintentionally stiffed I'll fix those and pass along my meaculpas (is that one word? never took Latin).

Paul Robinson - November 22, 2003 - Report this comment

Johnny D - Just posted the vote I screwed up the other day. Well, now I can sleep tonight.

Johnny D - November 23, 2003 - Report this comment

Thank you, Paul.

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Song Parodies -> See Cretaceous Man

"Secret Agent Man"

Johnny Rivers

"See Cretaceous Man"

Johnny D

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