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Song Parodies -> "The Burning Of Mylanta"

Original Song Title:

"The Battle Of New Orleans"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Johnny Horton

Parody Song Title:

"The Burning Of Mylanta"

Parody Written by:

Airfarcewon

The Lyrics

In November 2010 Mylanta was voluntarily recalled, due to what is described as some labelling concerns. According to sources within the company at that time, these concerns stemmed from the fact that small traces of alcohol were found in the flavoring agents of the liquid version of the antacid which was not disclosed on the labelling itself, and that the problem would be rectified "shortly". However, the product remains unavailable as of this date. The method used to dispose of all the remaining stock has not been determined, but since it contained alcohol, we believe it was burned.
In 2-0-1-0 Mylanta was recalled
With pressure from the FDA, claimed it was alcohol'd
Amount was only one percent, hardly a hill a' beans
But McNeil Consumer Healthcare promptly pulled it from the scenes..

Now fired's our gut - that ol' GERD just keeps a' comin'
Blue bottles, there ain't any, like there was a while ago
Pain's burnin' our butt, and acid keeps a runnin'
None for sale from North Dakota to the Gulf of Mexico

They're savin' our livers, but we're skittish in the Tum
We, "Gerdies" guzzled hundreds of 'em, by the case they'd come
Now well's run dry - and our lips need that blue ring
Ain't nothin' else can bring relief, and they gave it a fling..

Yeah, fired's our gut - and the GERD keeps on a' comin'
Blue bottles, there ain't any, like there was a while ago
Pain burnin' our butts, to stores, no use a' runnin'
None for sale from North Dakota to the Gulf of Mexico

Bure-auc-rac-y - just plows under little guys
By eliminating "Must-Haves" - we're expendable as flies
Fed up with fire - of reflux straight from Hell
Maybe we should march on DC with our X-rays, Show and Tell

Oh, fired's our gut - nasty GERD just keeps a' comin'
Blue bottles, there ain't any, like there was a while ago
Pain's burnin' our butts, to stores, no use a' runnin'
No "Mylanta" from Dakota to the Gulf of Mexico

For us frustrated buyers - can't they swing free samples
If there was a black market - 'Lanta sales would really flow
They'd sell out fast - all us poor souls'd grab 'em
Those blue bottles could be tippy - in the country, like befo'

Let's fire them meatheads from the FDA on down,
Unite and band together - maybe turn dumb rules around
Make 'em take down their banning walls - and get off our behind
Need some noise like a powder keg - the Revolution kind

Cause fired's our gut - nasty GERD won't stop a' comin'
Blue bottles, there ain't any, like there was a while ago
Pain's burnin' our butts, to stores, no use a' runnin'
Shelves are bare from North Dakota to the Gulf of Mexico

Not a bottle from Dakota to the Gulf of Mexico..

(Blue Mylanta, it's our mantra..)

Hup, 1 2 3...Hup 1 2 3....

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 LittleLots
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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   3
 3
 3
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Jonathan - April 07, 2014 - Report this comment
Oh Mylanta! 5's
Patrick - April 07, 2014 - Report this comment
Can't get decent cold medicine, thanks to FDA etc crackdown on dumb meth heads.
AFW - April 07, 2014 - Report this comment
Thanks, Guys,
Giorgio Coniglio - April 08, 2014 - Report this comment
Despite tempting title, isn't burning of liquid med a big stretch? Nonetheless, a great "Reflux Romp", Glad that you included the "beans" in the first verse.
Rob Arndt - April 08, 2014 - Report this comment
Nice one, AFW- 555! I've had a bad cold for 11 days and like Patrick said, I can't get any good cold medications OTC.

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