Well, I'm drivin' my Dodge along a long narrow rough and bumpy road
It's a swiss cheese of potholes, and I make a swerve to miss a toad
Feel a bounce and hear a loud bang, so I pull over quick..
Well, when I hop out of the car..the sight I see just makes me sick
A right rear tire has blown out...go back, unlock the trunk
And when I open it up, I just cannot believe the junk!

I don't have a spare, Man
There's no wheel in there, Man
All I do is stare, man
Way out here in nowhere, Man
I'm stranded without no air, Man
I don't have a spare...

There's just a:

Small bench
Liquid wrench
Bug stench,
Two potatoes
Fishin' reel,
A pin wheel,
Shoe heel,
Green tomatoes,
Carpet tacks
Three jacks,
Pair a' slacks,
Artist easel
Tampons,
Savings bonds,
Jar a' Ponds,
Garden Weasel,
Hanger,
Caliper,
Monitor,
Extra wiper,
Rubber viper,
Dirty diaper,
Candy Striper
I'm a griper...

I don't have a spare, man
Ain't no wheel back there, man
All I do is stare, man
Way out here in nowhere, man
I'm stranded without no air, man
I don't have a spare..

I find some...

CD's
Wheaties,
Three bees,
Two bananas
Crotch lube,
Inner tube,
Rubic's cube,
Map a' Kansas
Model clay,
Bale a' hay,
One hair, (gray)
Plastic cooler,
Big rock,
Small rock,
Broken clock,
Twelve inch ruler,
Golfers tee,
Tapestry,
Lock & key,
Shake & Bake,
Leaf rake,
Wedding cake,
Eyelash, (fake),
For God's sake!...

I don't have a spare, man
Ain't no wheel back there, man
All I do is stare, man
Way out here in nowhere, man
I'm stranded without no air, man
I don't have a spare...

I see an..

Oven mitt,
Drill bit,
Spray flit,
Pancake turner,
Bottle cap,
Fender flap,
Ginger snap,
Butter churner,
Band Aids,
Old Maids,
Ace of Spades,
Keyboard,
Lingerie,
Serving tray,
Chardonay,
A rotten gourd
Two Legos
Jelly roll,
Concertina.
Wheat Farina,
Roasted weiner,
Cappuccin'a,
Jalapen'a....

I don't have a spare, man
There's no wheel back there, man
All I do is stare, man
Way out here in nowhere, man
Just stranded without no air, man
I don't have a spare..

In here's a:

Pie tin,
Bowling pin,
Mandolin,
Pirate patches,
Bow tie,
Mince pie,
Horse fly,
Box a matches,
Artichokes,
Two cokes,
Eagle claw,
Broken whistle,
No Doze,
A gas hose,
Two stuffed crows,
Prairie thistle,
Can a' glue,
Half a shoe,
Stub from a zoo,
Lotto play card,
Popsicles,
Kosher pickles,
Roll a' nickles,
Triple A card..

(TRIPLE A CARD?
Hey!....Okay!...)

I don't need a spare, man
Dialed that cellphone air, man
No more pullin' hair, man
The Lord answered my prayer, man
Triple A said, "I'll be there, man"
I don't need a spare...

I don't need a spare...