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Song Parodies -> "If You Wanna' Be Horny...."

Original Song Title:

"If You Wanna' Be Happy...."

Original Performer:

Jimmy Soul

Parody Song Title:

"If You Wanna' Be Horny...."

Parody Written by:

Jeff in Richmond VA

The Lyrics

Women are supposed to be curvy!! Why on earth does our society glorify these skinny bony size-2 models who have thighs the size of my forearm? Give me Rachael Ray (Food Network), Kelly Cass (Weather Channel) or Colleen Lopez (HSN) any day!!
If you wanna' be horny for the rest of your life;
Never make a skinny woman your wife.
So from my personal point of view,
Get a chunky girl to marry you.

A skinny woman just ain't no fun...
That's because she ain't got no bun
If she's got a size 3 or 4 waist line,
You might as well not even waste your time.
And if you make a skinny woman your wife...
You'll be sorry for the rest of your life.
You get a cute, curvy lady with class....
You're always gonna' get a great piece of ass

If you wanna' be horny for the rest of your life;
Never make a skinny woman your wife.
So from my personal point of view,
Get a chunky girl to marry you.

(saxophone solo)

And if your friends got something to say...
Say to them, "Hey at least I get laid"
If she's got a cute, round, plump little ass
Take it from me she's a better catch!

If you wanna' be horny for the rest of your life;
Never make a skinny woman your wife.
So from my personal point of view,
Get a chunky girl to marry you.

(Hey man, I saw your wife the other day.......and she is chunky.....)
Yeah, but she sure can _______, baby......
(Yeah?)
Yeah.....

If you wanna' be horny for the rest of your life;
Never make a skinny woman your wife.
So from my personal point of view,
Get a chunky girl to marry you.

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.9
How Funny: 3.9
Overall Rating: 3.9

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2
 2
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   5
 5
 5
 

User Comments

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Tommy Turtle - October 14, 2009 - Report this comment
Love TOS; making excellent, though close, use of it ,subbing "skinny" for "ugly", which seem to be equated here. But hey, to each their own.

Nothing between "skinny" and "chunky"? Agree that the fashion models and C. Flockhart go to anorectic extremes, but slender with A or B-cup works fine here, better than overweight. Better health, too.

Was going to vote 555, but given what was just said, perhaps a slender 111 -j/k! ... fived.
TT The Movie - October 14, 2009 - Report this comment
Congrats on achieving the ultimate honor -- the Golden Unabomb! Pushed someone's buttons again, did we?
UnKnownVO - October 14, 2009 - Report this comment
this follows the ~OS~ quite well, sir ! . . . LOL

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