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Song Parodies -> "Say 'Vagina' -- We Won't Mind"

Original Song Title:

"Carolina in My Mind"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

James Taylor

Parody Song Title:

"Say 'Vagina' -- We Won't Mind"

Parody Written by:

Mari Aranoff

The Lyrics

This is dedicated to my cast-mates in "The Vagina Monologues" at SJSU! For the uninitiated, it's an award-winning play by Eve Ensler that is now performed all over the place as a fund-raiser for charities that fight to end violence against women. We're performing it later this week and it's been a great experience. It may not be particularly funny, but it had to be done. I'm still amazed by the reactions when I say "vagina," which is not a cuss word.
Can you say it? Can you say "vagina"?
It's not hard, you will find
Difficult word for mankind
If in an e-mail subject line
The warnings you will find
But if you say "vagina," we won't mind

When you say the word out loud
Folks get so embarrassed and turn beet red
Looking like they need a shroud
You shout it to the people and you'll disperse the crowd
But if you say "vagina," we won't mind

It's part of the anatomy
In women everywhere, all types
Such a place of mystery
It's called other names like "c**t" and "p***y"
Go ahead, say "vagina" - we won't mind

Can you say it? Can you say "vagina"?
It's not hard, you will find
Difficult word for mankind
If in an e-mail subject line
The warnings you will find
But if you say "vagina," we won't mind

Dark and silent sometimes, it
Is quite an entertaining chatterbox and
Sit on it, and it won't quit
It puts up with the tampons, thongs and speculums, oooh!
And the men who have vaginas on their minds

All the women like to talk about that place now
It's just like the dark side of the moon
But they just won't quit - they want to raise awareness
About that space, now
Looks like we have all got vaginas on our minds

You can say it, you can say "vagina"
It's not hard, you will find
Difficult word for mankind
If in an e-mail subject line
The warnings you will find
And if you say "vagina," we won't mind

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   3
 3
 3
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Johnny D - February 09, 2004 - Report this comment
Sure, why not write about this clinical, scientific, anatomical and biological subject matter? I say run it up the scrotum pole and see who salutes! 5's
Joelle - February 09, 2004 - Report this comment
How very true! 5's!
Jay W - February 09, 2004 - Report this comment
Picturing James Taylor singing this parody really cracks me up. I'm chuckling as I write this.
neminem - February 10, 2004 - Report this comment
Very nice. Yeah, the Claremont Colleges are doing it, too.
Mari D - February 10, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, all! I would also enjoy seeing James do this one, maybe in a leather bustier. Looks like the ones guy got me -- maybe it's vagina envy! Show time is Thursday evening. I'll be playing an old lady in a piece called "The Flood" and having a great time with it. A lot of colleges are doing it. And here's more about the V-Day movement, which has inspired all these benefit performances, plug, plug -- http://www.vday.org/contents/vday/aboutvday
Johnny D - February 10, 2004 - Report this comment
Mari, I wish you the very best for your upcoming theatrical performance - break a benwa!
Paul Robinson - February 10, 2004 - Report this comment
Mari D - Loved this one. Perhaps you should start a "Vagina Parodies" project. There must enough songs you could use to fill it with. I'm sure that would be a "hot" topic on the site. Well, time for my to stop "dicking" around and get back to work.
Mari D - February 11, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks again! Johnny: I'll pass the message on to my fellow actors. Paul: Interesting idea. Wonder how many vagina parodies are out there.
Kimberley - February 11, 2004 - Report this comment
Love it :)
Johnny D - February 11, 2004 - Report this comment
Mari D - yes, pass the message along, please! I like seeing how the word "Vagina" has not been censored here in this parody or in these comments. I hope the word "Penis" will receive equally fair treatment and not be censored either.
Paul Robinson - February 11, 2004 - Report this comment
Johnny D - Only a cruel "Dick-tator" would attempt to curtail the use of the word "Penis". The only way it might be censored would be if it were...ahh...used in the wrong way or place. What do I mean by that? ? Open to interpretation, I suppose.
Diva - February 15, 2004 - Report this comment
Very Good, Mari!
Paul Robinson - February 17, 2004 - Report this comment
Mari D - See you finally posted a bio on your author page. Nice one...Congrats!! I guess I'm running out of excuses...except my computer hasn't arrived yet (my fault, just ordered).
ashley - August 27, 2004 - Report this comment
dumb
Paul Robinson - August 28, 2004 - Report this comment
Mari D - see someone else made a comment on this one and so I was reminded of it. Even though they didn't like I thank them for bringing it to my attention once more so I could revisit and enjoy it again. 5's since my first vote from Feb. has now been wiped out.

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