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Song Parodies -> "Voyage Of The Damned"

Original Song Title:

"Henry The 8th, I Am"

Original Performer:

Herman's Hermits

Parody Song Title:

"Voyage Of The Damned"

Parody Written by:

Paul Robinson

The Lyrics

It's always a good idea to check out the safety record of the Cruise Line before you sign up for on of those "Luxury Voyages"...You may notice that in the midst of his dire straits (verses 1 & 3) our passenger here is also plagued by grossly unsanitary conditions (verse 2). It's bad enough to be doomed without having to wallow and slide through a whole "shipload" of crap...
On voyage of the damned, I am
Voyage of the damned; not what I planned
Every time I hear the ocean's roar
I wish that I had just stayed on shore
This voyage will be the end of me (end of me)
It hasn't gone the way that I had planned (that I planned)
Yes, this voyage will be the end of me
On this voyage of the damned


This ship's cursed; now things get worse

The toilets on this ship are jammed
They're all full of sh*t, they're fully crammed
Sewage overflows across the floor
Gross conditions I cannot ignore
This ship is not very sanit'ry (sanit'ry)
There's excrement now floating in my bath (in my bath)
Being on this ship tests my sanity
Seems we're targets of God's wrath

(Guitar solo)


Everyone who is on board is damned
Soon we'll see the rocks where we'll be slammed
I'm now shaking to my very core
Think my chances to survive are poor
We'll perish soon it is plain to see (woe is me)
I feel just like a sacrificial lamb (roasted lamb)
Soon I'll meet my death in the foamy sea
Davey Jones, sir, here I am

D-A-V-E-Y
Death at sea (woe is me) End of me (plain to see)
On the rocks we'll soon be slammed, dead; man
On this voyage of the damned

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 20

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   1
 0
 1
 
 4   0
 1
 0
 
 5   19
 19
 19
 

User Comments

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Kristof Robertson - November 05, 2004 - Report this comment
Tres excellent, Mr Robinson....sounds like a cruise I went on last year! 555
Jeff Reuben - November 05, 2004 - Report this comment
I really need to get the midi for this song...lots of parodies for it recently. It read well, I'll have to stop back later when I have the tune.
Adagio - November 05, 2004 - Report this comment
I haven't been on a cruise yet...this makes me want to stay home. :) Good one, Paul! 5's
Paul Robinson - November 05, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks Kristof, Jeff R. & Adagio. And thanks to JD for "nudging" me to think up and submit a "V" letter parody to enter into the (ABC "V") contest round...
Stuart McArthur - November 05, 2004 - Report this comment
I notice you like this OS, Paul, and I can see why - it rattles along so easily in your head as you read it - great choice - and great rhymes - 555
Paul Robinson - November 05, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, Stuart. Actually, I had never used it before I wrote that other piece last week. But it is an OS that is handy to work with, and since I was responding to a bit of a call from Johnny to put up a parody in the ("ABC" round "V") I was looking for an OS that wasn't going to be too punishing to work with pace-wise. Also, after using it for the first time the other day I realized I liked the OS phrasing and what you could do with it in creating a singable, nicely scannable parody. Lately I've been consciously trying to use artists or groups that maybe have been done much on this site or done much by me. It's been fun to stretch out a little in that regard.
AFW - November 05, 2004 - Report this comment
Sounds like a cruise ship without a crew...very funny and excellently crafted. 5's
Johnny D - November 05, 2004 - Report this comment
555 mg of Dramamine!

First Seagull to Second Seagull:
"See that cruise ship down there?"

Second Seagull to First Seagull:
"Yeah, what about it?"

First Seagull to Second Seagull:
"That, my friend, is a 'Ship Of Fools'."

Second Seagull to First Seagull:
"What makes them a 'Ship Of Fools'?"

First Seagull to Second Seagull:
"They're all looking up."

Know 1 can hear you dream - November 05, 2004 - Report this comment
You are sailing
All is failing
Told through mailing
We are vailing

I hope I used that last word right now...
John Barry - November 05, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, a lot, Paul! I'm just putting the finishing touches on my cruise plans. Funny 5s.
Paul Robinson - November 05, 2004 - Report this comment
AFW/JD/K-1/JB - thanks, all! K-1, were you looking for "bailing", as in filling up buckets of water than have come aboard the ship and then throwing that water back into the Ocean? JB - Well, this ship won't let you down...guaranteed or your money back AND a discount coupon for it's NEXT voyage!
Lionel Mertens - November 05, 2004 - Report this comment
Damm!!! this was good. 5's
Paul Robinson - November 05, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, Lionel!
alvin rhodes - November 05, 2004 - Report this comment
all i can afford is the jungle cruise at disneyland...nice job here..5s
Paul Robinson - November 05, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, alvin!
Mari D - November 06, 2004 - Report this comment
That was a hoot! Don't forget to fire your travel agent!
Paul Robinson - November 06, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, Mari!
Adagio - November 06, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) Already voted. Good one, Paul.
Paul Robinson - November 06, 2004 - Report this comment
Adagio, thanks again!
2Eagle - November 07, 2004 - Report this comment
Excellent pacing.
Paul Robinson - November 07, 2004 - Report this comment
2Eagle - Thank you!
Phil Alexander - November 08, 2004 - Report this comment
Glad I caught JD's comment on the comments page - this is hilarious :-)
Paul Robinson - November 08, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, Phil.
Meriadoc - November 09, 2004 - Report this comment
But the worst is yet to come - you've been shipwrecked on Greenland! (But I hear they have more computers per person than anywhere else on earth, so maybe that's a GOOD thing! ) :-)
Paul Robinson - November 10, 2004 - Report this comment
But Mer, I only NEED one computer (at least I think). Of course, I only NEED one TV set (if that), but I have TWO...One now serves as a gerri-rigged microphone stand in my living room...
Spaff.com - November 14, 2004 - Report this comment
The same thing happened to me once. See if I ever ride "It's a Small World" again.
Paul Robinson - November 15, 2004 - Report this comment
Spaff, it's been a long time, but I recall being tortured at the New York World's Fair in 1964 by having to go on the insipid "Small World" ride...thanks...
Peregrin - November 17, 2004 - Report this comment
I could have SWORN I had already commented on this! But as not, great work Paul!
Stuart McArthur - November 17, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) already commented, but I just want to say, it read just as well, if not better, the second reading
Johnny D - November 17, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) See above...but...DON'T LOOK UP(splat)AAAAGGGHH!!!
Jared - November 17, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) Fives overboard! Good luck, man
Paul Robinson - November 20, 2004 - Report this comment
Per/Stuart/JD/Jared - Thanks for sailing by! Per - it's probably just another of those "damned" things that have happened to this Cruise Ship...
Meriadoc - November 28, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) As above. Oh, I just blithered on about Greenland above, didn't I? Sorry! Good job! :-)
Paul Robisnon - February 08, 2005 - Report this comment
Mer - thought I thanked you back in November...guess not...better late than never? Perhaps...Thank you!

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