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Song Parodies -> "Amway"

Original Song Title:

"My Way"

Original Performer:

Frank Sinatra

Parody Song Title:


Parody Written by:

The Oneders

The Lyrics

Actually, I'm a regular here, but I've heard Amway is rather
lawsuit-happy so I'm posting this in even greater anonymity
than usual.
And now, the soap is clear;
It lets you wash flannels and curtains
The price, it may be dear
But SA-8, it works, I'm certain.

My closet, it is full
Of overstock, my upline I paid
Please, mom, buy just one more
I'm selling Amway

Recruits, I've had a few;
But then again, too few to mention.
I called all whom I knew
They all refused my intervention.

I tried to sell, of course
Training brochures sit in the hallway
My friends would not buy in,
They won't do Amway

They say of fraud Amway's accused
A cult or scam? Some say it's proved
Material to motivate
Will take the cash right off your plate
Certain to fail, a chance you take
Yes that is Amway.

They tried to change their name
Quixtar, Amway said, would sound better
Or "Team of Destiny"
Now I can see, not profit-getters

To think they tried all that;
And may I say ? a somewhat sly way,
Oh no, no more for me,
I'm done with Amway.

They said I must stay, I cannot go
I was brainwashed, the soap's for show
And I heard Forbes said it's not real
My diamond distributor revealed
That if you leave, you are a dweeb
But I've quit Amway!
Here's more about Amway. We parody. You decide.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   8

User Comments

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Tim Hall - February 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Great parody about one of America's worst pyramid schemes!
Mark C. Rhodes, III of Hickville, LI - February 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Don't be silly -- if Amway sues, think of the publicity your parodies would get! Hell, if you don't want to claim it, I'll re-submit it under MY own, name and even print my address with it to make it easier for their lawyers to find me. Then you, in turn, can sue ME for plagiarism, and we'd all be on Court TV for about a year! A publicist's dream!
Ravyn Rant - February 14, 2005 - Report this comment
I'd print this out to show to the friend who tried to get me to sell Amway for him years ago, but he's still bitter. The parody rang perfectly true. Fives from me!
The Oneders - February 15, 2005 - Report this comment
Hi Tim, thanks. Amway always says "we're not a pyramid." They also tell everyone they're now selling Quixtar, and that Quixtar's "not Amway." Mark C. Rhodes, III--I believe that's Hicksville, LI? Anyway you have my permission, whoever I am. Ravyn--I did Amway too, back in the early 80s, and sold a lot of soap to my Mother. I was out of it after a month. I found the whole experience to be rather hilarious, but I've seen too many people (a good friend and one of my cousins included) who bought the whole scam and lost lots of money and tested the patience of their friends and relatives.
kc - September 07, 2010 - Report this comment
nicely done! I'd be interested in checking out other parodies you've written...
jack Dalton - November 24, 2018 - Report this comment
this message is for the oneders i recorded amway and would like to send it to you. thank you, jack
The 1-der - November 25, 2018 - Report this comment
Thanks you for getting back to me so promptly. I was so worried it would be 15 years before anyone did anything with my song. Thank God it only took 13 years and 9 months!!!
Wonder Human - November 25, 2018 - Report this comment
On a less sarcastic note, this is a really good piece of satire, especially for a won-timer
LPG-Unit - October 08, 2021 - Report this comment
Amway's also the very same company who propagated the "satanist" rumours versus rival company Procter & Gamble, particularly chain letters claiming that P&G's CEO donated to Anton Lavey's satanic cult which was bunk even according to said cult itself. Given Amway's conservative Christian leanings and the "satanic panic" scare at the time, this isn't surprising; P&G successfully sued Amway for slander later.

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