You might change "coming to town" to "going to frown" if your locality is not deep blue. In my footnote, change "carols." to "songs; and I'm not tired; I'm just getting started!"

If you're not a right wingnut, change "O's health czars" to the apolitical "Food police".

The health czars would be after me and my bro in a hot second since we are known to eat unhealthy foods. It probably won't help if I hide my chips from them cuz' they'd have numerous ways of finding out eventually! I've also read this article entitled "F as in Fat 2009- How Obesity Policies Are Failing in America" and learned that adult obesity rates increased in 23 states and did not decrease in a single state in the past year. What I do is try to limit the amount of eating rice once per day and stick to salads, like my dad since he's got health issues. My mom's a nurse so she makes sure that we control our appetite and she's banned us from eating Chinese food for awhile! Here are some health conscious 5's!

Looks like a lot of us are trying to get an early start on Christmas this year. When you let the feds dictate your doctor, what logic or law is there to stop them from dictating your food? "O's Health Czars" is the correct description for the agents soon to be sent hither to harass the people and prevent them from eating of their substance. When the Republicans take over after next year's election, they will renege on their implied promises and then you can call them simply "Food Police". Nice, very singable lyrics.

I just polished off a nonorganic banana while reading your food-for-thought parody.

Big Blubber is watching you! :)

Not bad, not bad. Made me laugh. 555 pounds!