Song Parodies -> Sterile Darryl

Original Song Title:

"Mellow Yellow"

Original Performer:

Donovan

  
Parody Song Title:

"Sterile Darryl"

Parody Written by:

John Jenkins

How much is a Nicaraguan banana picker’s love life worth? Last week a Los Angeles jury awarded 3.3 million dollars to six workers who claimed they were left sterile by a pesticide used at a banana plantation in Nicaragua operated by Dole Fresh Fruits Co. How the jury awarded 834,000 dollars to one plaintiff and only 311,000 to Darryl is a question that perplexes him.
I’m quite angry at Dole Fruits,
Dole Fruits castrated me.
Only thing my tool’s good for
Is to go take a pee.

They call me sterile Darryl.
(Quite sadly),
They call me sterile Darryl.
(Quite sadly),
They call me sterile Darryl.

I was mad about Suzie,
She was to be my bride.
Now she’s doing Managua
Just to get satisfied.

They call her Suzie Floozy.
(Quite wildly),
They call her Suzie Floozy.
(Quite wildly),
They call her Suzie Floozy.

Lost my ejaculation,
Sperm production is nil.
But I still get “screwed” sensations
When I look at my lawyer’s bill.

I curse that legal eagle
(Quite pricey),
I curse that legal eagle
(Quite pricey),
I curse that legal eagle

Insects on their bananas
Are what Dole Fruits tried to destroy.
Erection-less banana
Is what I can no longer deploy.

They call me sterile Darryl
(Quite rightly)
I miss my Suzy Floozy
(Quite wrongly)
She’s doing Legal Eagle.

(Fade out)
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Voting Results
Pacing: 5.0
 
How Funny: 5.0
 
Overall Rating: 5.0
 

Total Votes: 7
Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 3   0
 
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 4   0
 
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 5   7
 
 7
 
 7
 
 
User Comments Follow...

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Guy - November 13, 2007 - Report this comment
You are probably wondering if these are votes in my pocket or if I'm just happy to see you. We'll they are neither - they're just some bananas. This parody is bananas and this court hereby awards you the sum of 5 bananas for your loss of being top banana.
Phil Alexander - November 13, 2007 - Report this comment
I do wonder how they decide on damages like that... well put into words (especially the "screwed" verse)
Paul Robinson - November 13, 2007 - Report this comment
Totally a guess, but perhaps by age...in other words, "Years of potential fertility lost". But that's just off the top of my head speculation. But I figure it's something to do with "lost productivity" of some sort or another. 5's ~ ~ ~
Red Ant - November 13, 2007 - Report this comment
Loved the last chorus. I hadn't heard about this story. Maybe the settlements were awarded based on banana size, in which case it looks like Darryl got the short end of the di.. stick, again.
PMS - November 13, 2007 - Report this comment
Dole-ing out some fives
AFW - November 13, 2007 - Report this comment
Here's my vote for Darryl and his other brother, Darryl
stuart mcarthur - November 13, 2007 - Report this comment
well, I DID say to Managua, "Just hang around Darryl - something tells me you're gonna get lucky" - sad story really - great idea and execution JJ (not so much for darryl though) - 555
John Jenkins - November 14, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks for the votes and clever comments. I like to read and write parodies about frivolous law suits, but this law suit was anything but frivolous.
Kristof Robertson - November 14, 2007 - Report this comment
Brilliant, JJ! Sad story, twisted into something riotously funny. 555

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