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Song Parodies -> "Captain Kirk, The Space Wanderer"

Original Song Title:

"The Wanderer"

Original Performer:

Dion & The Belmonts

Parody Song Title:

"Captain Kirk, The Space Wanderer"

Parody Written by:

Paul Robinson

The Lyrics

Those of you who watched the Original Star Trek series just may have noticed that Captain Kirk is somewhat of a "Space Lech". The thought of which reminded me of Dion's classic tune.
Oh, I am Captain Kirk and my ship's the Enterprise
I roam the Galaxy givin' all the girls the 'eye'
I beam 'em and I ream 'em 'cause to me they're all space sluts
I grope 'em, get 'em hopin', then I drop 'em on their butts
Well, I'm the 'Space Wanderer', like to get under her
My engines thrusting 'round and 'round and 'round and 'round

Oh, there's a Yeoman on my left and an Ensign on my right
But this alien's the girl that I'll be with tonight
And when I ask to see her mammoth space-girl breasts
She'll open up her shirt and show her 4-D giant chest
'Cause I'm the Space Wanderer, and I'll fondle her
Hands roaming 'round, and 'round and 'round and 'round and 'round

Oh, well I roam the galaxy
At all the girls I fix my stare
Yeah, then I scope 'em up and down
Then I have Mister Sulu beam 'em naked over here

Well, I'm the Captain of the ship called "Enterprise"
I fly all over space just tryin' to get a rise
And when I find myself a- fallin' for some lunar girl
I tell Spock "Beam me to the bridge", head for another world
Yeah, the Space Wanderer, don't get too fond of her
I 'warp' away and leave 'em right there on the ground

Yeah, well, I am Captain Kirk; my ship's the Enterprise
I roam the Galaxy giving those space girls the 'eye'
And when I find myself a-fallin' for some alien girl
I beam up to the bridge and head on for another world
I'm the Space Wanderer, won't get too fond of her
I fly around and 'round and 'round and 'round and 'round
'Cause I'm the Space Wanderer, you know I'll fondle her
Then 'warp' away and leave her right there on the ground

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 22

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2
 2
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   2
 1
 2
 
 4   1
 1
 0
 
 5   17
 18
 18
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Adagio - August 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Very funny, Paul....very singable :D 5's
Spock - August 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Although this parody is quite logical, your behavior as a Star Fleet officer, Captain, is quite irregular.
Guy - August 22, 2004 - Report this comment
And he's gonna do Nurse Chappel,
And his warp drive is buried,

Loved the part about beaming them over naked. Well done Paul.
Know 1 can hear you dream - August 22, 2004 - Report this comment
This is the Klingon Captain K1chyds personal log: To distract Captain Kirk of the Enterprise Im beaming over a list of very special smileys.

(o)(o) perfect breasts
( + )( + ) fake silicone breasts
(*)(*) high nipple breasts
(@)(@) big nipple breasts
oo A cups
{ O }{ O } D cups
(oYo) wonder bra breasts
( ^)( ^) cold breasts
(o)(O) lopsided breasts
(Q)(Q) pierced breasts
(p)(q) breasts with hanging tassels
(:o)(o) bitten by a vampire breast
\o/\o/ Grandma's breasts
( - )( - ) flat against the shower door breasts
Know 1 can hear you dream - August 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Apparently the Enterprise messages limitation shields were partly functional. Shooting again:

Johnny D - August 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Hey, Admiral Robinson! I loved this! Please --- keep your mind in that sub-space gutter long enough to write more raunchy & Yeoman-randy Star Trek parodies! ;-)
Know 1 can hear you dream - August 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Maybe I messed up the tags? Trying again:
K1chyd - August 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Naah, its the smaller than and bigger than stuff in "the breasts" that messes up the code. Go here for the whole list:
http://www.exet.nu/html/skoj/tuttar.shtml
John Barry - August 22, 2004 - Report this comment
I love the OS, and this is a great take-off.
Paul Robinson - August 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Morning all - Glad you liked it. Thanks for looking in! Know 1 - Those are very useful sub-space codes. I'll have Mr. Spock integrate them into our Comm program, as soon as I can find that Vulcan guy...he keeps disappearing into the bathroom with my Stardate 2173.237 edition of "Space Hustler" Magazine. He says he "reads the articles" and finds them "fascinating". Dammit, there ARE NO articles in "Space Hustler"...
Spock - August 22, 2004 - Report this comment
(In the Voyage Home Star Trek IV)

It is not the hell your magazine. Captain.
Kirk - August 22, 2004 - Report this comment
And I told you that?
Spock - August 22, 2004 - Report this comment
The hell you did...
Paul Robinson - August 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Yeah, well, Chekhov has it now and from the sounds coming out of the head I think he's doing something that rhymes with his name...
Spock - August 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Fascinating, but logic dictates that he beat it back to the bridge where his post seems to be a bit out of hand.
Trelayne, The Squire Of Gothos - August 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Excellent! I must beam you all down here so we can play!
Paul Robinson - August 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Oh, oh...I'm ain't playin' with Trelayne...I remember what it was like the last time...a bad loser...
Scotty (James Doohan) - August 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Oh, I Appeared On A CD-Rom Called Blast From The Past.
Mari D - August 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Cute! Sounds like you've taken too much LDS and are looking for nuclear wessels!
Paul Robinson - August 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Mari D - Thanks! But what would I be doing with "nuclear weasels" if I found them?
Jessy Leppert - August 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Scotty, Your Were On It With Don Adams, Ed Asner, Bob Denver, Barbara Eden, Florence Henderson, Judd Hirsh, Davy Jones, Jerry Mathers, Marion Ross, Jackyn Smith & Loretta Swit. With Host Dary Owens.
alvin rhodes - August 23, 2004 - Report this comment
4-D giant chest was worth 5s all alone...great stuff here
Paul Robinson - August 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Well, alvin, you know those alien girls...uhh...wait...maybe you DON'T...but sometimes the imagination is a firm enough tool to grasp the implications.
pickle - August 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Didn't he do Uhura as well?
Paul Robinson - August 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Well, pickle, he just MIGHT have...Thanks!
Michael Pacholek - September 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Spock! Where the hell is my copy of "Deep Space" magazine?
Paul Robinson - September 04, 2004 - Report this comment
Michael P. - I think Spock "Vulcanized" it, good luck getting the pages unstuck now...
Adagio - October 12, 2004 - Report this comment
(Fantasy/Sci-Fi) Already voted
Paul Robinson - October 13, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, Adagio!
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - October 13, 2004 - Report this comment
(SCI-FI) Fantastic rhyming. I'm no Trekkie but this one maintained my attention for several lightyears. 5s
Phil Alexander - October 14, 2004 - Report this comment
Lovely - "I grope 'em, get 'em hopin', then I drop 'em on their butts" had me hooked from the start :-)
Johnny D - October 16, 2004 - Report this comment
(Sci-Fi/Fantasy) " I'm Captain James T. Kirk, and I gave up doing subspace TV infomercials for Interstellar Priceline...I mean, let's face it, who wants to go on the Galactic Internet and spend 45 minutes trying to save 0.00005 credits on a can of Rigelian Sphincter Cream? "
Paul Robinson - October 17, 2004 - Report this comment
Jake-Luke/Phil A & Johnny D - Thanks! Glad you enjoyed this Inter-Galactic space romp with the Kirkennator...
Guy - October 17, 2004 - Report this comment
(SCI-FI) - Still love the naked beaming part. See above.
Paul Robinson - October 17, 2004 - Report this comment
Beaming you Thanks-a-plenty, Guy!
2nz - October 20, 2004 - Report this comment
Not much of a Trekker, but I'm still confused as to how I missed this for so long. Rhymes like 'Wanderer/Fondle her' make this a universal triumph. Great job, Paul.
martha - October 20, 2004 - Report this comment
I don't know why .. but I never really found star trek very sexy ... really funny Paul.....!
Paul Robinson - December 16, 2004 - Report this comment
2nz & Martha - Sorry I missed your comments back in October. Thanks!

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