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Song Parodies -> "Crash! Fiscal Black Eye"

Original Song Title:

"Suite: Judy Blue Eyes"

Original Performer:

Crosby, Stills, Nash (& Young)

Parody Song Title:

"Crash! Fiscal Black Eye"

Parody Written by:

Melanie Lee

The Lyrics

OS: OS live:
It’s gotten to the point
Where we can’t lend anymore.
We’re insolvent.
Our credit sucks
So badly we must shut it down.
We’re defaulting.

You owe us.
We owe them.
It has fallen hard—
This house of cards!

Remember when we spent and lent
And refinanced each other?
Oh Lord, have mercy!
Inflated rates
Dislocate another sub-prime dupe
Who had been laid off.

I owe you.
You owe them.
We owe all the world.
How stocks unfurled!

Dow Jones today
Fell eight hundred points—bleep! Wall Street!
Everyone’s crying.
This does not mean
That the system’s screwed up, we are solid—
Well, fundament’lly…

You owe them.
They owe us.
We owe all around.
Can stocks rebound?

Someone inside
Is telling me that we might be rescued—
That is, we rich ones.
Here is the bill,
The bailout, near one trillion bucks
Of your taxes.

We owe this.
You owe that.
We owe everyone
Under the sun!
Oh, we’re having fun!
Think I’ll kill someone!
Oh, we’re having fun!

Monday morning:
Merrill Lynch is sold away.
How much dough did you lose?
Friday evening:
Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac…
How much dough did you lose?

Who can tell it like it is?
(Stocks, they are falling!)
’Xplain it to us plain folk!
It’s the whole economy!
(Banks, they are failing!)
It’s crumbling, with thousands of jobs to lose!

I’ve got an answer:
Let’s live within our means!
Credit was much too loose!
How can I do that?
I got the sack today!
How am I gonna live?

(instrumental break)

Who’ll acquire Wachovia?
What happened to WaMu?
Buy their debt! Make a bet!
Debt bigger than Shamu!

Lehman Brothers bankrupt!
Bear Stearns has gone bye-bye!
Asking me, if market’s free,
Whom can we ask to borrow?

Senators and Congress,
President, taxpayers:
Save our banks! Bail us out!
Give us money!

Doo-doo-doo-doo-doo: we’re in deep doo-doo-doo!
Doo-doo-doo-doo-doo: we’re in deep doo!
Doo-doo-doo-doo-doo: we’re in deep doo-doo-doo!
Doo-doo-doo-doo-doo: we’re in deep doo…!

Oye, donde esta los trabajos?
Mi banque cerro sus puertas ayer!
El oso grande como mi-a hogar!
Mi familia vivira en la calle!
Ai! Ai! Ai! Aiiiiiiiiiiii!*

Doo-doo-doo-doo-doo: we’re in deep doo-doo-doo!
Doo-doo-doo-doo-doo: we’re in deep doo!
Doo-doo-doo-doo-doo: we’re in deep doo-doo-doo!
Doo-doo-doo-doo-doo: we’re in deep doo!

[*Hey, where are the jobs?
My bank closed its doors yesterday!
The big bear eats my-a home!
My family will live in the street!
Ai! Ai! Ai! Aieeeeeeeeeee!]

The Spanish isn't exact, but it's close!

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 4.3
Overall Rating: 4.3

Total Votes: 15

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   12

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

McKludge - October 08, 2008 - Report this comment
Love the OS, and this was a good effort on a tough song.
alvin - October 08, 2008 - Report this comment
very cleverly written...extra credit for the spanish...bravo
John Barry - October 08, 2008 - Report this comment
Get rid of that Goldman Sucks putz Paulson and let Melanie run the bailout!
Melanie Lee - October 08, 2008 - Report this comment
Thanks for the comments. Correction: it should be "come" (it eats), not "como" (I eat), on the "big bear" line.
John Jenkins - October 08, 2008 - Report this comment
Good stuff, Melanie, particularly the WaMU/Shamu rhyme.
Paul Robinson - October 09, 2008 - Report this comment
Wonderful job here. Great story-telling and an ALMOST perfect pace-match. Gotta be straight 5's, and only because that's the highest rating one can give. Only the minor-est of criticisms here: your sub lyrics for the last line of "I am yours/you are mine/you are what you are/and you make it hard" is a syllable short pretty much throughout...something easily correctly and not a significant detraction from this extraordinary piece of work. I noticed it because I know pretty much every note, beat and pause of the OS. The first occurence I would have said, "This whole house of cards", maybe...then, "Our stocks have unfurled", and lastly, "Can the stocks rebound"...with those slight additions I think it would be 100% 'perfectamente'...great stuff with the Spanish portion...I remember working with that on some pieces I did with this's tricky, but when you make it work it's a whole lot of fun, isn't it? I had to go with English, of course, since my Spanish most likely would not make a lick of sense. I might even try recording this, I think it would sing very well, and that's the ultimate "acid test" for a parody in my opinion...can you get the words out, can you get close enough to the notes while you're doing it, can your tongue handle the word-transitions cleanly...running it through my head I'd say it's about a 98-99% chance that it will.(I do vocals overlay recordings for my own entertainment, but I haven't done any in about two months now...this might get me going again, it's excellent material and would be both fun and a challenge to take on). Yeah, I'm jazzed here, Melanie ~ ~ ~
Paul Robinson - October 09, 2008 - Report this comment
OH...I forgot one thing. "Crash! Fiscal Black Eye" is a really great substitution for the OS title.
PMS - October 09, 2008 - Report this comment
Cinco cinco cinco
Matthias - April 01, 2009 - Report this comment
I'm not a big fan of political parodies, but I agree that this was a pretty fantastic title sub.
kevin - April 02, 2009 - Report this comment
i agree with mattais completly
Agrimorfee - April 02, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC) I enjoyed this a lot, Mel (may I call you Mel? :)). I don't have the benefit of the Youtube right now, but I see Paul Robinson's critique and I go along with what he says there. You captured all of the buzzwords and names of the topic at hand well, and the Spanish verse killed. Topicality is sometimes a drawback, but still...
bobpiecheese - April 10, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC) I don't like political parodies (because I never get them), and I have never heard of the OS, but I liked the title sub. Also, bonus points for the Spanish bit.
Arwen - April 10, 2009 - Report this comment
ABC...not super funny to me...I'm totally freaked out all the time about the Economy lately...but the pacing was good and this was well written. Nice work...and kudos for going bilingual!
Below Average Dave - April 11, 2009 - Report this comment
Agree on the state of the economy, and great job on the Bilingual stuff, but Mel, this OS was beyond ridiculously long. So much so I lost interest following it, I read it all, some good laughs, but man listening to this boring original song made me want to Gouge! My Two Blue Eyes. . .which if I were to ever punish myself enough to do this song would probably be my title. Seriously good write Mel, but the OS was not of my taste.
Red Ant - April 11, 2009 - Report this comment
Wow, I've heard this OS a million times, but until today never knew its name. Finances and long OSs rarely are done or work out well, but this was great to read, Mel, and you put a lot of effort into this. I didn't get the Spanish, but kudos for including it. $555 on the positive side.
Jeff Reuben - April 11, 2009 - Report this comment
ABC: Not lol funny, but well written and paced.
Claude Prez - February 16, 2018 - Report this comment
Well done! Really like the "deep doo-doo" part
Peregrin - February 17, 2018 - Report this comment
Lemme lead in with a slight re-working of BadDave's comments: I love CSN&Y, except this song. Dunno what it is, it always seemed to me they were trying too hard. Nonetheless - that is not your issue, so looking at the parody, although I had to suffer through the OS, I enjoyed the re-write to something more topical. Like Claude, the doo-doo part also caught my eye, and i thought the Spanish part was spot on! Mind you I don't speak-a da Spanish. Looked good to me :)

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