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Song Parodies -> "Only 9 Fingers (Missing A Thumb)"

Original Song Title:

"49 Bye-Byes"

Original Performer:

Crosby, Stills & Nash

Parody Song Title:

"Only 9 Fingers (Missing A Thumb)"

Parody Written by:

Paul Robinson

The Lyrics

Here's the 7th song of my "CSN, The Thumb Album" Parody Project. Gonna fool some of you here, the old cynic took the night off and let "Pauly-manna" do the writing. Those out there with irregular blood sugar should have their meds ready just in case. But once you get through thinking this is the sappiest thing you've ever read I bet you'll be smiling...The only bummer I can think of here is that most of you probably don't know the original song. It's the 10th and final cut on the first Crosby, Stills & Nash album from 1969. You know what? To say this about any other song I've ever written would be incredibly egotistical, but I feel the message here is much bigger than me or any other single person on the planet. I think some of you are going to like this so much you will buy this album so you can play it and sing along with it!! Seriously.
Only 9 fingers, missing a thumb
I didn't lose it
That's how I come
The other babies
They each had all 10
I just had 9; didn't bother me then

As I grew, then I knew
Didn't have one thumb, kid's made fun
Can't understand, was it planned?
Wanted to know why God made this so
Prayed while on my knees
But he would not tell me

As I grew up - was not a big thing
I started loving the good stuff life brings

(Instrumental break)

Had my pearl, was the world
Didn't miss that thumb, I had fun
I learned to plan around that hand
When I felt down, I just looked around
Some folks live in need
That don't apply to me
No, indeed
Nothing wrong
Writin' songs (Yo-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)

Life is so good (life is so good)
When you live the way you should
Folks who love you (folks who love you)
Know how much that they mean to you
'Cause life is such fun, hey
To complain is wrong
New days, new dawns; amazing
You're not trapped , say,
Don't like it here? Then go where it's at, hey
Maybe there you will get on track now, maybe
You'll find what you're craving
Life will be swell, there maybe
You will do well there, I say
You will find, you will find love
Life's not a fuss
There's no need to be jealous
You have been blessed (yes, you have been so blessed)
Always try and do your best
And life will be fun, say
More days, more dawns; just having life's amazing
What a ride, hey, when you treat everyone the right way
You'll behold wonders with your own eyes, daily
The Lord you'll be praising
Life is a wonder, you'll say
Living it full on each day
You will give, then you'll get love
Steve M at CCH: I had you a bit in mind when I wrote this...Hope you like it.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 1

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   1

User Comments

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Johnny D - March 22, 2004 - Report this comment
555 Five-Fives for Captain Paul Robinson, CSN (Commander of Sonic Nuance).
Paul Robinson - March 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Johnny D - Welcome aboard, do I get an epulet or an epithet with that Title? (Jeez, is "epulet" the word I want? You know, the rank thingee that gets pinned or grometed on the uniform)
David Chrenko - March 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Looks like you've got the "Crosby, Stills, Nash, and sometimes Young" parody contract under your, uh, thumb. 49 Bye-Byes gets you 3 5s!
Johnny D - March 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Yes, Paul Robinson, you are hereby awarded the chartreuse-and-brown epaulettes (or epaulets) of your new official rank: Fleet Admiral of The U.S.S. Amiright Parodiers.
alvin rhodes - March 22, 2004 - Report this comment
what a sad world it would be without thumbs...or thumb parodies
Adagio - March 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Yep, I didn't know the song, but based on your other scores for pacing, I was glad to give you 5-5-5!
Jack Wilson - March 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Great job, 555!
David Chrenko - March 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Does anyone remember the '60s Dick Van Dyke Show episode where he was visited by Kolak (Danny Thomas) from Planet Twilo - who took away his sense of humor . . . and his thumbs? What a horrrrible thought, Master!
Not To Be Nosey - March 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Well not to be nosey or anything but rumor has it you may be related to ah-hem "Angry, Write Mail."
Paul Robinson - March 22, 2004 - Report this comment
David/Johnny D/Alvin/Adagio/Jack W - Glad you enjoyed - Johnny, can you believe that? The word has MY NAME in the middle of it (ePAULet) and I couldn't remember how to spell it! Alvin, yes, among other inconveniences and tragedies it would cause you wouldn't be able to Thumb your nose at anything. Adagio, thought you might like it. David C -I do now! I wonder who wrote that episode? They might be as nutty as me. Not To Be Nosey. Gee, never heard of him, or trying to at this point anyway. I guess I'm recovered from that. Somehow I ended up in someone's Identity circus involving and revolving around 2 different parody comment streams at once. just lucky I guess. that's why I use my own name - there's already enough different sides to that identity, I couldn't handle anymore.
Johnny D - March 22, 2004 - Report this comment
David C. - earlier today, before I saw that comment of yours posted here, this parody of Paul's got me thinking about that Dick Van Dyke episode! I didn't remember the name of the actor (the famous Danny Thomas!) who played the guy who took away Dick's thumbs, or that he was from another planet. But I remember that episode, and I can visualize Danny Thomas now, wearing a black bowler hat and smiling a creepy smile at Dick Van Dyke, and Dick looking in shock at his thumbless hands!

Here's a synopsis of that classic Dick Van Dyke episode:
David Chrenko - March 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Johnny D, don't know if you or anyone else is a fan of the Dick Van Dyke Show, but its entire history, along with interviews, commentaries, and other cool extras, has been coming out on DVD in box sets. I just got the entire 1963 season box set (30 shows), and it's well worth the $50 price tag. You do need opposing thumbs in order to open the box, however.
Paul Robinson - March 24, 2004 - Report this comment
David C & Johnny D - Sounds like 'Thumb-Thing' the whole family could watch together, too.

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