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Song Parodies -> "Mr. Tidy-Bowl Man"

Original Song Title:

"Mr. Tambourine Man"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Bob Dylan

Parody Song Title:

"Mr. Tidy-Bowl Man"

Parody Written by:

Paul Robinson

The Lyrics

Well, I guess just about everyone has found themselves in this sort of predicament at one time or another.
Hey, Mr. Tidy-Bowl Man, clean the can for me
It is reeking and it's not something I want to do
Say, Mr. Tidy-Bowl Man, lend a hand to me
Swab the toilet; I would like to see the porcelain gleam

Though I know that last night's dinner left skid-marks in the bowl
Had sh*t running out my hole
'Cause diarrhea can be very disconcerting
And when I tried to pass some pee, I found that I must hold
doo-doo almost touched my pole
Just the thought of that sure interrupts my streaming

Hey, Mr. Tidy-Bowl Man, clean the can for me
It is reeking and it's not something I want to do
Say, Mr. Tidy-Bowl Man, lend a hand to me
Swab the toilet; I would like to see the porcelain gleam

I don't care to think no further 'bout that nasty, caked-on sh*t
It just makes no sense to trip, tried to clean it; almost flipped
My nose it caught a whiff; that made my eyes tear up -
I find I'm vomiting
It isn't that I just don't care; that just is not the case
I don't like to clean up waste; if you clean it I will pay
I promise I'll be generous

Say, Mr. Tidy-Bowl Man, please do this for me
I am freaking 'cause it's not something I want to do
Hey, Mr. Tidy-Bowl Man sh*t scrubbin's not for me
When you finish please make sure you leave the toilet brush clean

Though you might hear farting, gasps and moaning when I have the runs
I can tell you it's no fun; seems like I have sh*t a ton
Now my butt's so sore I do not feel like wiping
And though I feel some traces of crap between my thighs
At this time I'm of no mind to wipe more on my behind
That would cause my teeth to grind; and so no more I'll be wiping
because it's chaffing

Say, Mr. Tidy-Bowl Man, clean the can for me
It is reeking and it's not something I want to do
Hey, Mr. Tidy-Bowl Man, lend a hand to me
Swab the toilet; I would like to see the porcelain gleam

Now everything is smearing around the edge of my behind
Feel's like that it's ruined this time; it hurts so bad that I grieve
It's caused shaking in my knees; and it's hurting like a bitch
So I launch a twisted screech now in my sorrow
I've messed my pants and now I cry; I wish I had clean briefs
I don't have a pair with me; so I'm stuck in these bunged-pants
This is making me irate, leaving stains upon my shorts
Sure hope these runs go away before tomorrow

Say, Mr. Tidy-Bowl Man, clean the can for me
I am freaking 'cause it's not something I want to do
Say, Mr. Tidy-Bowl Man, please do this for me
When you finish please make sure you leave the toilet brush clean

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   2
 1
 1
 
 5   2
 3
 3
 

User Comments

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Adagio - April 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Nice read, Paul. Swiss-cheese memory on the song though.
Paul Robinson - April 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Adagio, Ah, another reminder of how OLD I am. Thanks for looking in. If you want to check it out later here's a sound file link: http://music.barnesandnoble.com/search/product.asp?sourceid=0040140226778­6227093&ean=696998516823&bfdate=04-22-2004+11:28:31
MrMacphisto - April 22, 2004 - Report this comment
LOL... This is really disgusting, but funny as sh*t...
Rod Worden - April 22, 2004 - Report this comment
I LOL, too! You are disturbed, Paul. Here's hoping you don't get well anytime soon! A pantload of 5s fer U!
Paul Robinson - April 22, 2004 - Report this comment
MacPhisto & Rod - Thanks! Hey, at least I said "please" in chorus parts...
Jack Wilson - April 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Three fives for P.Ro!
Paul Robinson - April 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, Jack W...
alvin rhodes - April 22, 2004 - Report this comment
i hate it when doo doo almost touches your pole....hee hee hee... this was wickedly disgusting, but that's right up my alley...5s
Paul Robinson - April 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Alvin, Thanks. I seem to have dropped a top grosser here. Did your vote post? I had "3" votes after Jack but it still reads at "3" now.
Phil Alexander - April 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Hey Paul - reckon I know what brought this on: somebody must have eaten the Tangerine flan mentioned here: http://www.amiright.com/parody/60s/bobdylan39.shtml
Paul Robinson - April 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, Phil. That would most likely do it.
Guy - April 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Were you a troubled toddler who suffered toilet training trauma? Disgustingly funny. In true room full of toilets tradtition I rate this parody five rolls of TP.
Johnny D - April 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Does this parody read counter-clockwise north of the Equator? 555, great work, Paul.

It's shameless plug time, folks..... Here's my take on "Mr. Tambourine Man", called "Missed Her Trampoline, Man!" :

http://www.amiright.com/parody/60s/thebyrds7.shtml
Paul Robinson - April 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Guy - not that I can recall, although everything from my early childhood seems to have a brownish colored hue filtered over it. Could that mean something? Johnny D - hmmm...Equator? got to think about that one...will take a glance at "Trampoline Man" whilst I mull that "equation" over.

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