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Song Parodies -> "He's Barry Bonds (and you're not)"

Original Song Title:

"I Fought the Law"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Bobby Fuller Four

Parody Song Title:

"He's Barry Bonds (and you're not)"

Parody Written by:

The Nag

The Lyrics

Did you know that lots and lots of major league ballplayers are speed freaks? It's all about those fast-twitch muscles. In fact a ballplayer taking the field without firing up a bunch of 'greenies' is said to be "playing naked". The speed helps infielders react to hot shots, and helps batters pull the trigger faster on that 98-mile per hour fastball. But hey, that's not a problem, apparently.... however take drugs to hit more homers, and you're a scourge. Go figure!
Shagging flies, in the warm sun --
He's Barry Bonds and you're not.
He's Barry Bonds, so you'll watch.
Reporters want a comment, and he has none --
He's Barry Bonds and they're not.
He's Barry Bonds so, Get Lost!

(Bridge) He left the weight room and the running track,
And went to creams and shots.
He got the best stuff that BALCO had --
He's Barry Bonds and we're not.
He's Barry Bonds and, got caught.

More than seven hundred -- home runs!
He's Barry Bonds and you're not.
He's Barry Bonds and, that's a lot.
Waits for his pitch, then launches one --
He's Barry Bonds and he rocks.
He's Barry Bonds and, he walks.

(Bridge) Whitey Ford used to cut the ball,
And Gaylord cheated gobs.
So how come they're both in the Hall?
He's Barry Bonds and they're not.
He's Barry Bonds and, they're... what (white)?

(Bonus Bridge) I'll miss old Barry and his many flaws --
I'll think he'll cut and run.
He hit the best shots I ever saw!
He's Barry Bonds and I'm not.
He's Barry Bonds and, I'm bummed!
(c) 2006 Norm Gaudet the_nag

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 3.5
Overall Rating: 3.5

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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User Comments

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Human Kind - March 13, 2006 - Report this comment
Being the most arrogant ass in the history of baeball, Bonds won't be getting any love from The Baseball Writers Of America, who vote on the Hall Of Fame.And after perjuring himself during the Grand Jury Balco investigation, where he had immunity from everything EXCEPT perjury, he now faces investigations not only from baseball, and probably Congress, but also the IRS. How his arrogance translates to his future 400-pound cell-mate, Bubba, might give him food for thought as he is denied entrance to the Baseball Hall Of Fame. Like Pete Rose, he'll be getting what he deserves. 422
Larry Hensley - March 14, 2006 - Report this comment
I thought this parody was good.
The Nag - March 15, 2006 - Report this comment
He's not Mr. Popular, is he? Thanks for playing both of you and thanks Larry for the kind words and I hope you check out my new karaoke-ready version.... I dropped the dopey alternate rhyme thing and just made it all rhyme.

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