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Song Parodies -> "Mass O' Chew Sets"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

Bee Gees

Parody Song Title:

"Mass O' Chew Sets"

Parody Written by:

Andy Primus

The Lyrics

A disappointing blind date

Chew sets = teeth
Pull = win the affections of (a possible partner)

Squeal: they’re going black, his mass o’ chew sets
Something’s smelling; gee, I must go home
For the blights make me frown: his mass o’ chew sets
Today I’ve left him standing on his own

Snide: I bitch, an’ hide in some slum disco
Hotter are the flings I wanna do
For more blights, he’s some clown with gassy poo pets
That boy’s a yak; to me, no way he’ll do

Talk about the strife; this lass, a brew gets
Dork (I doubt he’ll see pull) I have seen
And the blights make me frown: his mass o’ chew sets
That mass o’ chew sets: on my face, I’m not keen

I’m ill: remember, mass o’ chew sets

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.2
How Funny: 3.4
Overall Rating: 3.8

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   1
 3   0
 4   1
 5   3

User Comments

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Christie Marie M - October 05, 2010 - Report this comment
Nice to see you writing again, Andy! Great title play of this song! Mass O' Chew Sets! So hilarious! Sink your teeth into some 5's!
Andy P - October 05, 2010 - Report this comment
Thanks Christie - My PC died a couple of months ago, and I'd been waiting for my too busy brother to fix it. I've still been writing, just not posting them. The title comes from a sketch by UK comedian Kenny Everett. He plays all three of the Bee Gees (with false teeth & chest wigs) and sings lines from some of their songs. They sing this title when the interviewer (Kenny again) asks them what they think of their teeth. I saw a repeat of it on cable TV recently and got the idea to do the parody.
Tommy Turtle - October 05, 2010 - Report this comment
Very nice syllable-matching, and I admire other writers who, like yours truly, can write from either gender's point of view. Or is it just that you're bi? ;-D   (kidding!)

Imaginative spin on an inane OS. 555.

btw, Fiddlegirl and moi ran this one to twelve verses (plus footnotes, of course), and still didn't cover all the material that was there. No obligation, of course, and no offense taken if not read;
Andy P - October 06, 2010 - Report this comment
Thanks TT - It had to be the female point of view, else I couldn't have used "this lass, a brew gets".

"Or is it just that you're bi?" - what has being an animal that walks on two feet got to do with it? At least I've got feet; not them flippin' things that you have. :)
Mare Garrel - October 07, 2010 - Report this comment
The title actually reminded me of some old "mock interview" that some comedian put together years ago. Genius!
Andy P - October 07, 2010 - Report this comment
Thanks Mare, the comedian was Kenny Everett

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