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Song Parodies -> "Conspiracy (the Nutters Spree)"

Original Song Title:

"Dear Diary (of August 2016)"

Original Performer:

Peter Andersson

Parody Song Title:

"Conspiracy (the Nutters Spree)"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

Inspired by Peter Andersson's previous work. My version is shortened (63 lines) and modified in places to suit my needs. Enjoy!
What comes first?
No moon landings is the worst
Cover-up means viewers are all cursed
No moon shots, studio rehearsed!

Number two
9/11 inside job will do
Building 7 collapse as proof
Even though it's all been disproved!

Number three
Chemtrails in the sky for all to see
Government spraying, but not for disease
Contrails from jets they don't believe!

Number four
Moon's a Hologram from Martian lore
Sphere projection satellite & more
Astronomy these freakin' KooKs abhor!

Then a fifth
Rocket in a vacuum can't stay lit
No air to push through spaceships
Newton's Third Law gives them fits!

Number six
Fluoridation brainwashing tricks
Soviet techniques- it all fits
Tell the truth, I don't give a sh-t!

Seventh sway
Apricot seeds make cancer go away
Although you'd better swallow 100 per day
Toxicity? What's that you say?

Number eight
Vaccines cause autism debate
Celebrity introduced science fake
Modern medicine: no link to state!

Number nine
Flat Earth Society still alive
Ice walls at poles, climb, take a dive
Ever wonder why they don't search the sky's outline? Eclipse shapes, Roundness defined?

Number ten
AIDS made in lab to kill Gay men
So-called secret Operation
Should read a Bible 'bout homo sin!

Ten plus one
Tupac's alive and on the run
Will appear one day as chosen one
Coroner Y-cut pic was on so many dot.coms!

Number twelve
Russian drilling in Siberia found hell
Sounds of screaming miles down the well
Fake recording exposed hoax. Hits fell...

Number thirteen
The old Hitler escaped routine
Flight out, Spain, submarine
FBI Investigation proves... NOTHING!!!

Number fourteen
Watch out! The aliens are coming!
Grays, Reptilians, Venusian beings
Roswell, no aliens... just a Horten Delta wing!!!

Number fifteen
All the hoaxes that we've ever seen
Crop circles, Bigfoot, Unicorns, the Thylacine
KooKs thrive on all these things!
Which is nice when one was a teen...

NOW GROW THE F-CK UP!!!
When I was a kid I was fooled by the Cabbit on "That's Incredible." The Cat-Rabbit turned out to be a cat with big feet that had hip dysplasia!!! You can't breed a cat and a rabbit to make a hybrid, even if all of Japan still believes it!!!

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 4   1
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 5   9
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User Comments

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Peter Andersson - September 06, 2016 - Report this comment
I know there are way more conspiracy theories than fifteen - why are you covering things up? Are you in league with the men in black or the lizzard people - or BOTH!? Also, that super extra long last line on number nine - looks like code intendended to infest my computer! Now I have to wrap tinfoil around my internet cable - look what you made me do! :-)
Rob Arndt - September 06, 2016 - Report this comment
I may do the other 15, but the teens annoy me! Peter, do you know the percentage of conspiracy nuts in Sweden or Europe? In the US it's estimated 35-40%!!! I live in California, so the absurdities abound. Chemtrails, secret military exercises, apricot seeds kill cancer, birther nonsense, alien abductions, NASA hiding proof of God!!!
Peter Andersson - September 07, 2016 - Report this comment
No idea, not really into that stuff, unless of course you count watching/reading sci-fi and horror for entertainment and that way en passant picking up enough knowledge about the bigger household memes in the area (you know, like 51 (pun totally intended!)) and occationally throw one or some of them in a parody/comment myself and/or hold my own in a discussion in the break room. :-)
Lucy Lement - September 07, 2016 - Report this comment
Funny way to showcase these conspiracy theories!

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