Making fun of music, one song at a time. Since the year 2000.
Check out the two amIright misheard lyrics books including one book devoted to misheard lyrics of the 1980s.
(Toggle Right Side Navigation)

Song Parodies -> "Touch Myself"

Original Song Title:

"Bless Myself"

Original Performer:

Lucy Hale

Parody Song Title:

"Touch Myself"

Parody Written by:

BentleyBro

The Lyrics

The idea for this parody came to mind out of nowhere (prolly coz of all the funny comments about doing that kind of stuff on TV, which is bloody hilarious to tell you the truth). Anyway, here's a parody I NEVER thought I'd write. And it's actually pretty clean, in my opinion.
There's a little secret I would like to tell you
There's a book of p*rn I know they'll try to sell you
And they'll try and they'll try to convince that you're bi yet again
So, the next time you frown, just reach down, not around

I can touch myself
There's no need for someone's help
There never is shame
If no one should touch you but yourself

I can justify
The fact it don't make me bi
It feels really good
My boy's in the hood
And I won't lie
Coz I have touched myself

I have watched those girls to find there's nothing better
Touching me, myself and I shall not stop never
And I know for a fact that I don't give a crap anymore
Yeah, I've done it a lot and they called me a wh*re

I can touch myself
There's no need for someone's help
There never is shame
If no one should touch you but yourself

I can justify
The fact it don't make me bi
It feels really good
My boy's in the hood
And I won't lie
Coz I have touched myself

Do you ever wonder how j*cking it can make you cry?
Haven't you discovered that there's pain you feel when you do it and deny
In your life...
Can't f**k them with your eyes

You can touch yourself
There's no need for someone else
There never is shame
If no one should touch you but yourSELF!

I can touch MYSELF!
There's no need for someone's help
There never is shame
If no one should touch you but yourself

I can justify
The fact it don't make me bi
It feels really good
My boy's in the hood
And I won't lie
Coz I have touched myself
Boy's in the hood = A line from an episode of King of Queens. Not sure what it meant, but I know for a fact that he was talking about (bleep). Disclaimer: I am not bi. I am straight. Not that there's anything wrong with being bi. I'm just not bi.

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

Place Your Vote

 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



In order for your vote to count, you need to hit the 'Place Your Vote' button.
 

Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   7
 7
 7
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Old Man Ribber - February 20, 2013 - Report this comment
Bro - Calm down. Get hold of yourself! (blush) That was an unfortunate choice of words on my part. ;D

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

Link To This Page

The address of this page is: http://www.amiright.com/parody/2010s/lucyhale0.shtml For help, see the examples of how to link to this page.

This is view # 362