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Song Parodies -> "TOPSY"

Original Song Title:

"DELAY"

Original Performer:

John A. Barry

Parody Song Title:

"TOPSY"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

In 1903, Thomas Edison wanted to show the public the dangers of rival Westinghouse's DC current vs his own AC current. So he arranged for a public execution of an elephant that had trampled 3 people over 3 months (2 accidents and an abusive handler). The circus elephant was named Topsy and became the victim of DC current. For "humane" purposes the elephant was fed poisoned carrots laced with cyanide before the demonstration. It was chained and then exposed to thousands of watts of DC electricity. It faltered, fell, twitched, and died in a public spectacle... all b/c Edison was a bastard who wanted to promote AC current over DC at any cost and to shame rival Westinghouse in public.
T is for elephant trampling,
O’s for the obituaries- three,
P’s for punishing feed,
S’s for shocking AC,
Y’s for yelling, crowds complaining ‘bout Edison’s chore

Elephant death made Westinghouse sore

Topsy science experiment crude,
AC/DC “current war” made news
Spectators were gawkin‘, AC current was shockin‘—
Westinghouse singin’ the blues

T’s for it twitching several ways,
O’s for no ovation that grim day,
P’s for poison carrots fed pre-slay,
S’s for such a sad story, Tom had his way,
Y’s for year, ‘03, settlin’ a score…

death of circus pachyderm mourned

Topsy‘s execution was bad news,
Topsy’s death was animal abuse
Death was a blow—Edison‘s “DC safety” excuse;
to promote his AC use

Topsy was shakin’
weight made it hard to execute;
it was chained, upright position. Poison fed, people gawked,
ate cyanide while it chewed;
then was shocked, dropped dead- what did it prove?

Topsy, VICTIM, DC use:
Edison made people puke
Only proved that HE was cruel, arrogant fool

[Tesla was smarter, used electricity too]


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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.3
Overall Rating: 4.3

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 3   0
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 5   5
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User Comments

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John Barry - March 14, 2013 - Report this comment
I'm on top of it. . .got one done.

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