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Song Parodies -> "Sexy Preacher"

Original Song Title:

"Sexy Teacher"

Original Performer:

John A. Barry

Parody Song Title:

"Sexy Preacher"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

Parody of a parody X14!!! This one deals with Pastor Melissa Scott of the Los Angeles University Cathedral televangelist ministry who has a claimed 186 IQ and knows 15 languages including Greek, Hebrew, and Aramaic. As such she has taken over the ministry from her deceased husband, the controversial Dr. Eugene Scott, with a TV Show entitled "God's Word Rightly Divided". She once was a Vivid porn star known as Barbie Bridges in the '80s and claims to have been saved. But her husband and her owned a porn company Barbie Bridges Productions that produced NEW porn even as Melissa Scott bought out Vivid's entire stock of her old movies and has shut down as many YouTube clips as possible. Her husband was an older man with a trophy wife and Melissa Scott inherited $700 million in assets including a Lear Jet, Pasadena mansion, multiple side businesses, and other land. She rakes in around $1 million/mo for her ministry and has round-the-clock security. A bit peculiar, right? Watching her on TV is fascinating as she breaks down scripture word-by-word and shows off her knowledge and language skills... but still, with her very long hair and sexy looks many male viewers at least still see the "Barbie Bridges" in her. Pics below...
Sexy preacher, sexy preacher, former Miss Nude!
Vivid, vixen, Barbie Bridges was wild
Your curves in my brain were insane; no more, a fool,
you teach that pornography should be reviled

(Accountable now, not a child)

Televangelist empire has sexy preacher
With an IQ of 186 she’s smart
15 languages and, yes, Aramaic
she looks great, can‘t escape: stare
Filled with passion am I, sexy preacher.
Panting through your time slot; evil dog, loves the dark

Help me, sexy preacher… Satan depart!

I should be studying Hebrew, sexy preacher:
rightly dividing the Word would be new start
TV class, etymology through steps,
but you‘re so fair—screw Bible cares!
Swollen member. . .can’t have sexy preacher…
Pastor Melissa Scott I can‘t blink, I’m torn apart!
BEFORE as porn star and AFTER as Pastor: http://www.washingtonheightswarlord.com/0946bp06.jpg http://www.thegodpromises.com/images/Pastor-Melissa-Scott-2.jpg

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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John Barry - October 04, 2012 - Report this comment
Snake oil, so to speak.
John Barry - October 04, 2012 - Report this comment
Another one comin' at ya.
Rob Arndt - October 04, 2012 - Report this comment
Keep 'em comin' JAB... guess I'll fire back on Monday ;-)

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