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Song Parodies -> "StuG"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

John A. Barry

Parody Song Title:


Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

Designed to a 1936 specification, the StuG was initially an assault gun built on a PzKpfw III chassis that was intended for tough infantry support. It arrived in 1940 and soon grew in numbers up to over 9000 by 1945. The StuG had a low profile b/c it was turretless, the main gun built into the main structure. It had a 4 man crew and was cramped to the point that the German commanders spent a considerable time half out of machine exposed. But German commanders prefered to call their shots, so this really did not matter. There were 7 versions from A-G, the last being the most armored and lethal. All carried a 75mm StuK, but the latter models had StuK 40s vs StuK 37s. Armored skirting was added and structural improvements. The assault gun quickly became a potent tank destroyer and was often mistaken for a German tank, usually with the skirting, wrap around top armor, and painted camo as a PzKpfw IV. Although not very beautiful the StuGs were lethal and remained in combat until the end. It's intended replacement was the StuH 42 with 105mm main gun and more armor. An 88mm version was in the works too, but only made it to mock-up stage... in wood. Thank God!
S’s for silhouette, came in handy,
t’s for tough with tenacity,
u’s for ugly and was somewhat ungainly,
G’s for gun blow; 75 (mm) KwK 40 throws!

As tank destroyer fighting foes

“StuG” as assault gun type was quite new,
StuG infantry support on the move
Feuds! For tank- mistaken!
Many battle scars were taken!
“StuG” by numbers? Quite a few!

S’s for seven A thru G,
t’s for terror when it was seen,
u’s for untold victories—as artillery,
G’s for great, it was hot; never ignored, fired, gun roared

With skirting, looked like a Mk IV

StuG had cramped interior and 4 crew,
StuG forced commander up —into view
StuG was a play-maker:
Dual-role assault and tank-breaker
“StuG” in numbers: The "Crude Brood!"

StuGs on both fronts heavily used
Over 9,000 built was proof
Its size was medium,
but the profile was minimum
StuG, “armored fist” was bad news!!!

“88” version? Wood…
This was just too easy to write from memory :)

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 16

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 4   0
 5   15

User Comments

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Rob Arndt - February 11, 2013 - Report this comment
Note: This parody only deals with the StuG IIIs and not all StuGs. There was the latter StuG IV and also a StuG V project. Here is a pic of the StuG III Ausf G: and here is the intended replacement StuH 42:

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