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Song Parodies -> "'Gratch' F*cked Mujahs Up"

Original Song Title:

"Retched Gross Meal Up"

Original Performer:

John A. Barry

Parody Song Title:

"'Gratch' F*cked Mujahs Up"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

Parody of a parody X50!!! Su-25 Frogfoot (aka Gratch) in action in Afghanistan 1981-89.
Mujahs rose up, in Afghanistan survivin’. . .
smuggled arms in to combat the Soviet swine
Fierce-fought battles, stayed in shadows; much cave dwellin‘;
rainin’ down ancient rounds and downin‘ Mil Hinds

(Shootin‘ had them crashin‘ mountainside)

High scores, weapons forged; rifles to edged metals
tortured the heathens and ripped out their black hearts
Caused the Red Army a lot of terror—
gave up? Oh no. Jet was ready and from Sukhoi
In sky appeared suddenly—then attacked!
GSh opened up and tore Mujahs apart

Its BETA bombs hit marks. . .high spots were blown-up!

“Gratch” f*cked Mujah’s up, so no more great escapades
Losses were lighter than similar counterparts
Su-25 with firepower;
Had 8 hard points with room to spare
Afghans dying. . .situation dire
Backed by US side, Stinger shipments sent, steel darts

“Gratch” was tricky, Stinger couldn’t tear it apart
Armored bulkhead between engines proved to be smart
Up one tail-pipe, other functions, targets marked
Continued attack, “Gratch” finishes what it starts
“Must be a German Product” the Mujahs remarked!!!

‘89 finished; the beaten Red Army departs…

[“Gratch” was the US A-10 rival counterpart]

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 16

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   14

User Comments

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Rob Arndt - December 07, 2012 - Report this comment
Note: Gratch is the Russian term for the Rook, a bird that can get food in hard to reach places. GSh-30 refers to the main gun and BETAs are 250kg bombs x8 hardpoints= 4,400 lbs ext. ordnance. With drop tanks the Su-25 could reach 1212 miles or more depending on how many carried and it also could carry AAMs for defense against other a/c although in Afghanistan there really was no need. Further ordnance up to almost 10,000 lbs total could be carried and its engines were seperated by an armored bulkhead for protection. Pilot sits in a 1" titanium bathtub with armored glass for protection. Speed of 620 mph, height 23,000 ft. The perfect ground attack a/c. Losses in Afghanistan were low campared to all other types. At one point the USSR was losing 1 aircraft or helo per day! From '81-'89 Gratch losses were 23 total, some hit on the ground and some due to accidents. Could take Stinger hits and survive. A-10 has advantage with the Avenger main gun and Hellfires but Gratch has equal survivability and excellent striking power with added ability to fight other a/c with AAMs. Su-25 Frogfoot:
John Barry - December 07, 2012 - Report this comment
Got it. Back to you Monday. Maybe we should try to get this series published when it's done. . .whenever that may be.
Rob Arndt - December 07, 2012 - Report this comment
Hey JAB, we reached 50 already!!! Recap: Javelina-Stefania-Mama Mia-Angelina-Alopecia-Seraphina-Palestrina-Palestina-Galicia-Galaxina-Bandolina-X-Sea Creature-Sexy Teacher-Sexy Preacher-Semple Preacher-Fame-Whore Seeker-Shakey Gore Leecher-Armed War Soldier-Arm-Slung Holder-Black Dive Bomber-Wack-Jive Bombast-Sex-Drive Wild Kat-Ex-Wife's Pile's Fat-Davy Crockett-Wavy Sock-It-Kammler's Gambit-Wascal Wabbit-Lethal Habits-Regal Hat Tricks-Really Toxic-Pealing Tocsin-SD Salon-Kitty Sal's On-Pity Hal's Job-Gritty Flash Mob-Gritty Tough Job-Pretty Watch Fob- Pharangeal Jaws-Phar'onic Job-Mechanical Dog-Maundering Blogs-Marauding Warthogs-Macadam Dog-Foster & Co. TOG-Fossiling Togs-Anti-Tank Dogs-Auntie's Tanked Up-Ghetto Sealed Up-Retched Gross Meal Up- "Gratch" F*cked Mujahs Up!!!
John Barry - December 07, 2012 - Report this comment
Thanks for the recap. Rob
Rob Arndt - December 08, 2012 - Report this comment
Hideous Il-102 rival that lost:

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