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Song Parodies -> "Lethal Habits"

Original Song Title:

"Wascal Wabbit"

Original Performer:

John A. Barry

Parody Song Title:

"Lethal Habits"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

Parody of a parody X28! Repost: One of the strangest tales of WW2 I have ever read about was the German Army's plan to arm BDM athletic girls and train them for covert operations under the guise of being nuns!!! They were to be armed with light small arms and explosives hidden under their garments and also hollowed-out Bibles with pistols and explosives! Prior to a Blitzkrieg invasion in 1940, they were to be air-dropped into various nations and tasked with securing strategic targets while sabotaging others. It was believed that no nationality of soldier would suspect a nun of being an enemy. As such, they could approach and occupy targets easily with minimal training since the BDM (like the HJ) performed regular physical and psychological training. But the Operation "Blume" (Flower) never materialized b/c Hitler would never approve of female soldiers in any form. Aryan policy was the three Ks which translated into English meant "Children", "Kitchen", and "Church" for women. To a higher standard, a German female was to bear male children for the Reich for continuous war. The SS used this as the basis of their Aryan procreation Lebensborn program. So no KGK (KampfGruppeKirche) Kommandos took part in the 1940s campaigns against Denmark, Norway, France, and the Low Countries. It would have been interesting to see how they would have performed. German women were allowed into limited war production, as test and ferry pilots, concentration camp guards, and both flak and naval helferinen. Hanna begged Hitler in March 1945 to form an all-female combat unit and got permission only to have it rescinded 7-10 days later. It was to be NSFK female trainers flying suicide missions for the Luftwaffe either in the Reichenberg R.IV suicide craft (manned V-1) or He-162 jet fighters! The Catholic Church for its part in WW2 covertly aided the Nazis.Under "Blume" the Church would have provided additional minimal training as nuns and the use of Latin to avoid having to learn several languages. 5th columnists were already in many of these nations with flags to set out for air drops aiding German Fallschirmjaeger, so they would provide bicycles and other materials to the fake nuns. Others had foreign police uniforms and soldier uniforms ready to approach and take key targets like bridges for the German Army. The KGK women would have supplemented them and sabotaged many locations to distract from the invasions, providing diversions. They were to be trained to kill with knives, bows, explosives, and small arms. Real German nuns would refuse this task so BDM females were to led by Jana von Ardenne (a volunteer athletic youth coordinator who was also a competition shooter).
German panzers, for Blitzkriegin‘, wanted women;
they were to be put to use; to serve or die
From BDM athletics; foreign speech—callin’
Fake nuns inserted by air to make fast strikes

(to serve as bait: kill at night)

The mission would be tough, no room for error
decoy Servants of the Lord; of last resort
but Jana would dare- no life to be spared
dressed in habits, pistols to bear
Latin speaking, Godly worship chatter
Purge, fight; seize bridges and roads for advancing horde

Moving the troops and panzers forward!

Hollow Bibles and habits shed, swift attackers:
girl Nazis—say, they’re well-trained, from gun sports!
Quick-seizing foreign turf gives them pleasure
soldiers in disbelief just stare
As they slay, orders obeyed. Up to the task!
Weapons were missed; Devil’s black kiss and fallen forts

Bad luck! KGK stuck—was rough; choice to abort
Hitler declines. Triple K female roles kept short…

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

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 5   9

User Comments

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Patrick - October 31, 2012 - Report this comment
My fifth grade replacement teacher would have been perfect for the job. We even called her (not to her face) Sister Mary Hermann Goering.
AFW - October 31, 2012 - Report this comment
Interesting...sounds sort of James Bondish, in a way

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