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Song Parodies -> "Invasion Ready"

Original Song Title:

"Call Me Maybe"

Original Performer:

Carly Rae Jepsen

Parody Song Title:

"Invasion Ready"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

IS Vlad Puttin' us on with threats of WW3???
Uraine is going to hell
Poor Russians not treated well
I hear as the complaints swell
I hear them everyday

Don't have to put up with this
Kiev must have a death wish
Look West, now I am quite pissed
Nothing stands in my way

PRE-CHORUS
The West is stalling
Sanctions, threats appalling
A fight, is now brewing
They know where this is going- badly...

CHORUS
Hey, West I hate you and NATO's crazy
Troops on the border, invasion ready
Heat up the rhetoric- call me crazy
Bear doesn't slumber, invasion ready
Hey, West I hate you and NATO's crazy
Troops on the border, invasion ready
And I have air assets and my Navy
You must remember, invasion ready

Crimea took a great fall
Annexed it in no time at all
In my court is the ball
'Cause this is MY ground game

You beg, whine, and appeal
I pretend it's not real
You don't care how Russians feel
Don't stand in my way

PRE-CHORUS
The West is stalling
Sanctions, threats appalling
A fight, is now brewing
They know where this is going- badly...

CHORUS
Hey, West I hate you and NATO's crazy
Troops on the border, invasion ready
Heat up the rhetoric- call me crazy
Bear doesn't slumber, invasion ready
Hey, West I hate you and NATO's crazy
Troops on the border, invasion ready
And I have air assets and my Navy
You must remember, invasion ready

Before Ukraine was in strife, relations weren't bad
But now they are sad, relations so, so bad
Before Ukraine was in strife, relations weren't bad
The coup made me mad, EU sway so, so bad

(Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad)

West should take another view, really
Troops on the border, invasion ready

CHORUS
Hey, West I hate you and NATO's crazy
Troops on the border, invasion ready
And I have air assets and my Navy
You must remember, invasion ready

Before Ukraine was in strife, relations weren't bad
But now they are sad, relations so, so bad
Heat up the rhetoric- call me crazy
But still remember, invasion ready


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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.1
How Funny: 4.1
Overall Rating: 4.1

Total Votes: 13

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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User Comments

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Russky Plutocrat - April 28, 2014 - Report this comment
Putin and his cronies are more Western than Buffett. The crook has $40 billion stashed away in his personal accounts. Made the dough the same way Romney would -- buying public assets at a gigantic garage sale after the USSR collapsed. He's as American as apple pie. Obama has it right: follow the money.
Callmelennie - April 28, 2014 - Report this comment
Hey I just read this ... This is crazy .... But here are three fives .... Enjoy them maybe ..... And some crazy troll ... might give you ONE-sies ... But don't get upset ... It's just for funsies
Callmelennie - April 28, 2014 - Report this comment
A fun song to parody. I can tell you, that previous comment was the most fun I've had all day ...... But then again, I've only been up for ten minutes
Cate - April 28, 2014 - Report this comment
Will Putrid actually start a world war??? scary sh*t
Rob Arndt - April 28, 2014 - Report this comment
Who knows? But at least Putin is in his (Russia's) sphere of influence and the West would be foolish to go to war over Ukraine. It would be, however, a good test of new Russian miltech against Western miltech. Russia is obviously a REAL threat with a huge amount of resources and airspace that can't be easily compromised like Third World dirt nations. And why the outcry in the West when ethnic Russians in Crimea and E Ukraine WANTED Russian intervention and annexation? Don't THEY have the right of self-determination for their personal and economic security? Hell, Europe is slow to condemn b/c they need Russian energy, and the US is on another continent. What business is it of the US to meddle? Does anyone want a new Cold War or a World War? Not yet ;-)
Putin is a Butt-Strutting Peacock - April 28, 2014 - Report this comment
Putin is a Pudding-Head bully. He's been dogged by the Chechen terrorism war for ages (just like Boris Yeltsin before him) and instead of tackling it he gets on the Russian gays with this "gay propaganda" excuse. Then there's the Olympics, Russia gets a lot of medals. Putin also gets the band Pussy Riot arrested. There's some turmoil in the Ukraine and that gives Putin a diversion. But it all shows what a failure he truly is. Around 10 years ago, the economy was in horrible shape (still is now), our government would not attempt to punish the a$$holes who destroyed the Towers on 9/11 but swiveled attention on an illegal war based on lies with a bad sand bandit who had nothing to do with 9/11 and didn't have the WMD. Money, lives, American honor and more - wasted. Also, 10 years ago our forces were sent to Haiti to get Aristide out of office for no good reason. On Sesame Street, Ernie gets up and turns on the radio to drown out the sound of a dripping faucet. Then he turns on a vacuum to get rid of the radio noise. Bert gets out of bed and turns the vacuum cleaner off, then he shuts off the radio "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!" Click. Then he tightens the faucet so that it stops dripping. See any parallels here? Little problem, ignore it and divert your attention to something else - so you can look good. NOT!
Rob Arndt - April 29, 2014 - Report this comment
Of the four points you mention with Russia/Putin, only half are valid with the treatment of Gays (other side of the world tradition mentality) and the Ukrainian Crisis. The Olympics don't matter as it is a world event, Russia just hosting... and the other two are not caused by Putin. Chechen violence and key word- terrorism- are just as valid as the US vs Al Qaida, which is on-going and poses a grave threat. Why shouldn't Putin engage? And there have been several Chechen Wars and terror attacks against innocent civilians. They're just closer than our Al Qaida enemies. As for "Pussy Riot," they just walked into a church and started singing and screaming out obscenities which are not permitted. First, the US loved to call the Russians/Communists godless atheists and then when they worship... you want to defend vile PR??? The songs (plural) that they sang not only targeted Putin but were blasphemous and disrupted the service. Putin is well-liked in Russia and abroad by ethnic Russians in the region. Ukraine overthrew their democratically elected leader over a battle over trade direction and the nation is not only bankrupt but wants to join NATO and encroach on Russian territory. NATO agreed that they would NOT expand when Germany was reunited in 1990 and of coursed LIED! The Russians feel provoked by Western forces and weapons on their borders and no way they would let the Black Sea Fleet lose Sevastopol. That's just common sense! Crimea made no objections to Russian forces and voted to be annexed. That's self-determination and in the E Ukraine the ethnic Russians there want the same thing. Sorry that Ukraine is a divided nation... but you know what happens to one- it falls one way or the other. And the US for all the threats of sanctions and sabre rattling with the weak EU... can do really nothing. Russia is a real threat militarily and WILL fight the US and Europe in its sphere with quality forces and equipment. Not the US traditional Third World weak nations that gave the 80s- ODS wins. The US now has lost Iraq and Afghanistan and wasted so much money and lives for a bad cause. So what if Hussein and Osama are dead? Iraqi terrorists hold Falluja and the Taliban has Afghanistan. Al Qaida moves on and the world is no safer 13 yrs after 9/11. If anything, the world is a more dangerous place!!!
Putin is a Butt-Strutting Peacock - May 09, 2014 - Report this comment
OK, I've been away for a while, but here's my response. First, the Olympics do matter because in most cases the host country will probably try to make a politicized issue with it. The 1996 Olympics were in Atlanta and the US media biased and censored the whole thing. The athletes (most of them) were whining if they got anything less than gold. Katie Couric and John Tesh kept on speculating, BS-ing, chattering - they wouldn't STFU. Eric Rudolph, a neo-Nazi terrorist, set off a bomb and the press first put the smearing blame on a security man. It was an election year so Bill Clinton was filmed shedding a crocodile tear. Such a smooth operator, he. Al Gore stood up and did that dumb-butt Macarena. Clinton won re-election easily. Olympics can and often do get political makeovers. Chechen terrorism is very important but I mentioned that Putin ain't engaging, at least not enough. He can't seem to tackle that open sore, or maybe he just isn't trying, so there's the LGBTs to suppress, I guess. When Rome had a fire Nero kind of "spun the wheel" and the pointer landed on the pie slice labeled "Christians". So he put the blame on Christians and persecuted them. Putin can't / won't stop the Chechen terror menace so guess who he hits on? Gotta look TUFF! Olympic Games coming up, ya know! Pussy Riot was wrong to storm in a church to make their video there. They said that a local bishop was Putin's puppet. That type of corruption does go on, unfortunately. Those girls had a right to express what they did, but a cathedral wasn't a good place for that. So I figure charges of "disturbing the peace" and "invasion / barging in / something like that" would be valid, but a prison sentence is a bit extreme. Saying your president is a peckerhead is not the same as advocating someone murdering him. The Ukraine had a coup over a globalization trade issue which exploits cheap 3rd World labor, overthrowing a democratic government installed in one of the "Color Revolutions". Putin is taking advantage of the unstable situation so he wants to carve the Ukraine up. Hitler used the same method on Czechoslovakia and such by spreading lies of persecutions and bringing up ethnic issues out of the hat. Who says that the Crimea and Odessa really wanted to be annexed to Russia just like that? Were their any elections - NO. I ain't buying that crap. Still, it shows Putin to be negligent and a failure. The Chechen war beat goes on and on... Just like I didn't buy the lies concerning Iraq for a minute. Saddam is dead, nothing was solved from that wasteful, money-sucking ratings-grabbing corporate war. bin Laden is dead but it took nearly 10 years for that to happen and that is a vivid scar of gross negligence from a gang of morons who would not pursue and punish the guilty parties. Al Qaida was allowed to become the monster it still is today. The USA has shamed itself and we looked like Neanderthal azzholes. The NATO intervention in Libya's Civil War may have been an attempt on the road to rehabilitate America's image and world standing. It was all air + sea attacks, Libyan rebels did the ground fighting. A smart move. Still, sanctions are a good motion to put on Russia. Economic and other sanctions took some time but they got Khadaffy to compensate the families of the victims of Libyan terrorism, and it also got South Africa to call for free elections and eventually dismantle apartheid.

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