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Song Parodies -> "I Don't Know How to Use a Fork"

Original Song Title:

"Burn"

Original Performer:

Usher

Parody Song Title:

"I Don't Know How to Use a Fork"

Parody Written by:

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The Lyrics

A newer version of I Don't Know How to Use a Fork by parodist Weirdo Jace. This remade version has completely new lyrics and is a parody of a completely different song. Enjoy.
I don't understand
Why
I can't even hold onto this
I know this is something I've gotta do
But that don't mean I want to
What I'm tryin' to say is that
I don't know how to use a fork,
I feel like...I don't understand the prongs
The handle's too small,
I let it go now
"Cuz when I hold on, it hurts me,
But I've gotta let it burn,

It's gonna burn for me to say this,
It's coming from my soul,
I've spent a long time preparing a romantic table,
As I start to take it out, I quickly put it back away,
It's silverware, a fork; it is the cause of all my pain,
I sit down with one and I start to try to handle it,
Now I'm hurtin', baby, bloody napkins, baby,
I put it down before I lose half of my fingertips,
I don't know how to,

Use a fork,
Well, there's something I need to say that I've told nobody,
Don't know how
But I don't, want you to go,
Not ready to,
Hold it up like you do and stab it into my food,
It won't work,
It won't work,
I don't know how to use a fork,
Now, there's something I must tell you,
I hate the thought of it ever glaring through,
I know that it will show,
When I eat my food,
It won't work,
It won't work,
I don't know how to use a fork,

Yellow Pages, I'm lookin' for fork school,
Not finding anything, but I want you,
To know that eating just ain't the same,
When I'm doubled over in pain,
Yes, I try to grab it in my hand,
And it seems I can't understand,
It's just the way I feel,
I look at the steak,
I put down my plate,
And I want to put it back,
But what I've gotta do now,
Even if it means the plates might crack,
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,
Man, I don't know what I'm gonna do without my food,
I've been trying for so long,
It's been 27 days, 14 hours, and I still don't know how to use a fork!

Use a fork,
Well, there's something I need to say that I've told nobody,
Don't know how
But I don't, want you to go,
Not ready to,
Hold it up like you do and stab it into my food,
It won't work,
It won't work,
I don't know how to use a fork,
Now, there's something I must tell you,
I hate the thought of it ever glaring through,
I know that it will show,
When I eat my food,
It won't work,
It won't work,
I don't know how to use a fork,

I'm twisted, "cuz one side of me just wants to continue using spoons,
And on the other side, I want to break down and cry,
Ooh!
I'm twisted, "cuz one side of me just wants to continue using knives,
And on the other side, I want to break down and cry,
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,
Ooh, ooh, ooh,
Don't know how to use a
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,
So many steaks, so much baked flour,
I'm still burnin' until I can learn!

Use a fork,
Well, there's something I need to say that I've told nobody,
Don't know how
But I don't, want you to go,
Not ready to,
Hold it up like you do and stab it into my food,
It won't work,
It won't work,
I don't know how to use a fork,
Now, there's something I must tell you,
I hate the thought of it ever glaring through,
I know that it will show,
When I eat my food,
It won't work,
It won't work,
I don't know how to use a fork.
I'll record it soon enough. Make sure to check out my other stuff while you're at it.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 12

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 2   1
 1
 1
 
 3   1
 1
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 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   10
 10
 10
 

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