Ketchup, on my bun
Ketchup, I have so much fun with
Ketchup, shake well or water will run
All over your burger

Put it on what you wish
It goes real good on fish
Have this at dinner tonight
We can have some every night
A little extra will not hurt
When Mom’s cooking doesn’t work
Squirt it out, it’s alright
No matter what you’re having for dinner tonight

Ketchup, on my fries
Ketchup, never on the side
Ketchup, use it so I don’t realize
What I’m acutely having
Ketchup, off the floor
Ketchup, gimme some more
Ketchup, ‘cuz I’m such a whore
For that stuff they call ketchup

Vinegar and lycopene
Taste better than lima beans
Vegetable allowance everyday
Ketchup five times is the only way
A condiment that’s good on everything
Except for chocolate moose tracks ice cream
Trust me, it taste just fine
I put it on my potato chips all the time

Ketchup, my addiction
Ketchup, to the skin
Ketchup, that forms around the lid
‘cuz ketchup is better than anything else
Ketchup, I had too much
Ketchup, I can’t get enough
Ketchup, ‘cuz meat loaf sucks
So I’d rather taste ketchup than anything,
Rather taste ketchup

You know (you know, you know, you know, you know)
It’s bad for me
I know (I know, I know, I know, I know)
It’s got fifteen calories
You know (you know, you know, you know, you know)
A serving is a table spoon
I know ( I know, I know, I know, I know)
I’m gonna die sooner or later…

Ketchup, with every meal
Ketchup, that’s what I feel
Ketchup put it on my toast and banana peal
‘cuz I’d rather taste ketchup than anything else

Ketchup, a shame to waste
Ketchup, lick it off my face
Ketchup, say Hell no to mayonnaise
‘cuz mayonnaise is for fat-lard pussies
Ketchup, all over my food
Ketchup, it’s so damn good
Ketchup, I’d live off of it if I could
‘cuz I’d rather taste ketchup than anything else
Rather taste ketchup than anything else
Rather taste ketchup