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Song Parodies -> "I Want To Be A Death Eater"

Original Song Title:

"I Want To Be A Producer"

Original Performer:

The Producers

Parody Song Title:

"I Want To Be A Death Eater"

Parody Written by:

Matthias

The Lyrics

This song may be a bit fan based, but it's my only one, and it still reads funny without knowing much Harry Potter information. Warning there's spoilers, but since I'm sure the hardcore fans already read book 7 there's nothing to worry about. Here's the OS: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xr5dU1aENls&mode=related&search= (FYI: I used the album which is slightly different than the Youtube video)
(Slytherins)
“Unhappy… Unhappy… Very Unhappy
Unhappy… Unhappy… Very, Very, Very, Very, Very, Very Unhappy”

(Goyle)
I got Potions in the morning…
Tons of homework in the evening…
Make sure them answers be right…

(Draco and Slytherins)
Make sure them answers be right…

(Draco)
I spend my days at Hogwarts
With Severus Snape

(Slytherins)
“He’s snappy”

(Draco)
My dad gets the job that’s thrilling
While I watch and gape

(Slytherins)
“It’s crappy”

(Draco)
If I was in the Shire
Ring Wraith would be my goal
I crave a job that dire
Cause my heart’s a black hole

(Draco drops quill and struts through common room)

(Draco)
I want to be a Death Eater
Cause a cheap ho doesn’t pay

I want to be a Death Eater
Yes, It’s Harry who I’d slay

I want to be a Death Eater
Sport a black hood and a cape

I want to be a Death Eater
And sleep with Bellatrix Lestrange

(Draco grabs Crabbe and Goyle.
They saunter, until Draco gets tired of them and knocks them into desk)

(Crabbe and Goyle)
Oooooooooooh…

(Draco)
I want to be a Death Eater
Go and bitch slap Pettigrew

I want to be a Death Eater
And kill you, you, you… And you

I want to be a Death Eater
A Horcrux and Wizard Fights

(Crabbe and Goyle)
Ah, Ah, Ah, Ah, Ahhhhhhhh, Ah

(Draco)
I want to be a Death Eater
And get those sweet dark magic rights

(Draco tap dances)

(Crabbe and Goyle)
He wants to be a Death Eater

(Draco)
Damn right, Guys

(Crabbe and Goyle)
Voldie’s great big evil staff

(Draco)
That’s how I get my jollies

(Crabbe and Goyle)
He wants to be a Death Eater
With an loathsome wicked laugh

He wants to be a Death Eater
Cast his wand till you die

ZIP!
ZAP!
POOF!
BOOM!
POP!
CRACK!

(Whistling)

He wants to be a Death Eater
Work with folks like Barty Crouch

(Draco tap dances again)

(Draco)
I wanna be…

(Crabbe and Goyle)
He wants to be…

(Draco)
I wanna be…

(Crabbe and Goyle)
He wants to be…

(Draco)
I wanna be the deepest, darkest
And most sinister Death Eater in the world!!!

(Crabbe and Goyle)
He wants to be a Death Eater
Killed off Dumbledor for only spooks

(Draco)
I just got to be a Death Eater
Work with dad and other kooks

(Crabbe and Goyle)
His dad and more kooks

(Draco)
I want to be a Death Eater
Show the Dark Lord what I got

I want to kill of pros
Just like a mob hit

Read my name in “Daily Prophet”

I want to be a Death Eater!!!!
While I’m here… I ain’t… got squat

(Slytherins)
Unhappy… Unhappy…
So unhappy…

Very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very…

Bored

(Draco)
I want to be a Death Eater…

(Draco spoken)
Hold everything!
What am I doing here?
Severus Snape was right!
There’s a lot more to me than just studying!
Drop the quill, I want to kick ass!

(Chattering among Slytherins)

(Cornelius Fudge Spoken)
Malfoy!
What you think your doing?!

(Draco Spoken)
Mr. Fudge, I got news for you
I’m out!
Here’s my cauldron, My ironed and folded school dress robes, and my old Nimbus

(Draco sung)
I’m gonna be a Death Eater
I was born to kill of bums

I’m gonna be a Death Eater
Look out Mudbloods here I come!

(Slytherins)
Mudbloods Here He Comes!!!

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 12

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   1
 1
 1
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   11
 11
 11
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Jack Wilson - July 13, 2007 - Report this comment
This is awesome! 5s
Melanie Lee - July 21, 2007 - Report this comment
Hilarious! You dropped a couple of rhymes, but I'll let that go. I love Broadway musicals, and I'm starting to get into Harry Potter films. 555.
Peter Andersson - August 05, 2007 - Report this comment
IMHO it's too fan based for a SOTM top position, but not too fan based for being in the comp in the first place, heck I've done my share of fan based parodies over the years so I should know1 when I C 1. :-)
Agrimorfee - August 15, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) to be hard-core Harry Potter, Crabbe & Goyle would not have had any lines (note that they haven't said much more than a grunt or two in the entire series). However, this was a slam-bang number for the future Broadway smash hit "Potter!" 555
Max Power - August 16, 2007 - Report this comment
555 fried Crabbes
Red Ant - August 16, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Wish I had seen more of the HP movies than the first two. Unique choice of OS, Matthias, and some very clever subs. Fav line: "I wanna be the deepest, darkest And most sinister Death Eater in the world!!!".
Kristof Robertson - August 28, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Top write, Matty...I love dark subjects set to cheery musical numbers. As Peter said, maybe a bit to fan specific to be enjoyed by everyone, but lots of fun. 555
bobpiecheese - August 29, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I know absolutely sod all about the HP universe, and the OS is completely lost on me, but it looks like it was a bee-yotch to write, so I'll give you credit for that!
Phil Alexander - August 29, 2007 - Report this comment
Yay! I could see this... some great lines in there, too :-)
stuart mcarthur - August 29, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) damn that long youtube intro! - big effort Matthias - it must have been hard coming up with lines to fill such short stanzas, which is what makes Musicals parodies so hard - I don't know anything about HP but imagine it would have been tough matching its storyline to the OS - and I loved " And kill you, you, you… And you" for some reason - 555
wannabemustangjockey - August 30, 2007 - Report this comment
SOTM - It pains me to say this, but while certain lines were incredibly well written, some others seemed like you got tired and gave up (at least in the area of proofreading). I suppose it didn't help that the YouTube video was a different version of the OS than you used, so a lot of things appeared to be missing when I tried to match it with the video. Oh well, I can still see that this was a tough one to write, and it does indeed have its moments.
Jack Wilson - August 31, 2007 - Report this comment
See above!
Below Average Dave - August 31, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) You kinda skipped a little, the spoken parts are a big part of this song. . .however the fact that you wrote out the whole thing is quite amazing. . .Although I saw some slight pacing blips--the length of the parody made it to average probably close to 95% accuracy, which would be nitpicky to hit you on--so excellent work, if it doesn't make my top 5 it would only be due to some areas that just wouldn't work for performance purposes, which you know is key in my grading scales. . .HOWEVER--turning a performance happy like this into a song about a somewhat evil character (in Draco) wanting to be a dark hideous creature which represents the magic world's version of corrections officers is just hilarious
Lilyandra Potter - February 18, 2015 - Report this comment
Awesome, truly awesome. I did 12 years of waiting in azcaban for this

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