I Just Wanna Be Fat

Last night I went to bed not eatin'
Cuz I'd already et too much.
I faced the fact that I had donuts
On the oak nightstand as a crutch.

I've been heavy seven years now.
Sometimes it feels like 21.
I'm still mad at Doctor Atkins,
He left me when I needed him.
I've been up since five gobblin' cornbread and stew,
And I've got to tell you the conclusion I've come to:

I'll never eat, I'll never stray.
My love for food will go away.
But I ain't ready to start up.
I'll get around to that.
I think I'm too fat in size ten.
But there's that dessert cart again.
Please don't cramp my style.
I just wanna be fat for awhile.

Well, now you just might as well forget it.
Don't run your fingers through my hair.
Yeah, that's right, my bouffant's stashin':
You'll find a corned- beef- on- rye up there.
I'm gonna leave for work with a chocolate Danish,
But as I'm snarfin' it, just remember this:

I'll never eat, I'll never stray.
My love for food will go away.
But I ain't ready to start up.
I'll get around to that.
I think I'm too fat in size ten.
But there's that dessert cart again.
Please don't cramp my style..
I just wanna be fat for awhile.