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Song Parodies -> "Dave's Petting Zoo"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

Tenacious D

Parody Song Title:

"Dave's Petting Zoo"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

A place I used to love to go
Was the local Petting Zoo
But now it’s a calamity
The cows are gone, pigs too

The new owner is a strange creep
With animals that are brand new
His name is B.A. Dave
And they say he’s out of his mind

These creatures he created
During all his long free time
They are not goats or lamb
These things are hard to describe

When I saw some bovines grazing
I thought I would be safe
But these things were ghostly cattle
From the burgers that I ate

I ran out of there screaming
A spider web I fell into
Now in the net he’s rolling me
This spider is quite huge!!!

Gotta fight him off and go find a phone
Think that I never should of left my home
Into my hair some Kool-Aid bats have flown
This petting zoo is making me just groan

(Below Average Dave)
I hope you’re having loads of fun
While you’re here in my barn
These creatures I’ve made aren’t just cute
Can’t find them in stores

In this cage is a terrorist
A penguin, Can’t you tell?
But don’t you mind his evil smirk
He has no shotgun shells

There’s a super hyper puppy
Who will talk and rap and sing
And he’ll do it with perfection
Just for a doggie treat

You’ve got to check them out all these pets I own
Guys say I’m a freak when my Cock Star’s shown
I simply roll my eyes, I can’t be dethroned
Cause I am never bored with my termite drones

David you’re pests scare me
Your bird said, “That’s nice cologne”
I have paid for the admission
But a refund’s what you owe

Those Independent Turkeys
I’m surrounded by a flock
They’ve had a farm upheaval
That made me kind of shocked

I’m not the farmer still they pecked
At my swollen hand
My money back is what I want
Cause I am frickin mad!!!

(Below Average Dave)
I’m sorry Sir Matthias
But all refunds I do block
That might leave you in depression
And the killer fish will mock

To keep within my budget
The doors are bolted down with wood
And unless you give me dough
You will become one with their hood

With the power of phantom cattle
And the wicked Kool-Aid bats
You’ll fork over your allowance
Or become an Emo Cat

It’s sad for your misfortune
Catching rats while blasting punk
Cause now Fall Out Boy’s your main band
Be glad you’re not a skunk!!!

So I went to damn Dave’s Petting Zoo
Which wasn’t much too smart
Now I lick milk and I chase mice
And meow loudly in the dark

A warning to all you
Dave’s Barn’s worse than Jurassic Park

Please do not think that I created all of these creatures up by myself. This is a story tribute to my good friend Below Average Dave who has created all of these critters in his parodies "Cattle", "Death Bound Spider Feed", "Kool-Aid Bat", "Watch Out For Fish", "Jason's Bird", "Doggie", "Cock Star", "Crazy Love For Splinters", "Independent Turkeys", and "Antarctican Terrorist"

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   10

User Comments

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Christie Marie M - July 06, 2009 - Report this comment
Great parody you wrote, Matthias!! In regards to Dave's zoo, it reminds me of this book of George Orwell's Animal Farm in a way! Also great take on BA Dave in your song. Here's 555 munchies to feed the animals on Dave's Petting Zoo.
Below Average Dave - July 06, 2009 - Report this comment
You know/knew I'd like this one, fun OS too. . .the inclusion of the Independent Turkeys, my talented/gifted dog, and the Kool-Aid Bats was particularly awesome, I've written so many human-character like animal parodies where they take on their own persona, sometimes I forget some of the earlier ones. . .5s easily, and thank you:)
MadameNorCAL - July 07, 2009 - Report this comment
Yeah, this reminds me of CowboyDave's attempts of entering the BULL Business, with stock he bought in May-He-Go . . . Ol' PortugeseRanchers still laughin' their heads off, from their wheelChairs ! ! . . . I'll skip the 'deTaileds' of this tale, Sir.
Fiddlegirl - October 27, 2009 - Report this comment
That's a "class" menagerie! :)
Abbott Skelding - October 27, 2009 - Report this comment
Not bad, I DKTOS or the songs referenced, so most of it was lost on me, but nice job anyway.
Silver Power - October 27, 2009 - Report this comment
Aha, I did read this, but It slipped my mind to comment! Good parody, I love the OS and the movie that it's from! 555! My apologies!
norCALvotress - October 28, 2009 - Report this comment
{ CABO ~ WABO } SquireMatthias ! !
Agrimorfee - October 31, 2009 - Report this comment
(Art) This was way cool...i dont' think you have to know Dave's work to appreciate the humor. Creativity aplenty, here, Matty.
Guy - November 01, 2009 - Report this comment

Matthias - This could be anyone's pet peeve. So much for heavy petting. Great take off on BAD and things's he's done. I'm pattin' this one down with 5's.
bobpiecheese - November 03, 2009 - Report this comment
(Artistry) That's quite a manic menagerie Dave has! Definitely one of your odder parodies, while also one of your best. 555!
Below Average Dave - November 05, 2009 - Report this comment
Well, see above--obviously my opinion hasn't changed:)
DJ Blaze - November 06, 2009 - Report this comment
I've probably read this 100 times and still haven't commented?!?! 555!!!
Rex - November 06, 2009 - Report this comment
(Artistry) Surreally good!

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